HEALING THE VIOLENCE AGAINST THE SELF:
Earth as a Monastic Initiation Chamber

Client Telephone Reading, October 4, 2003, 7PM EST, Louisville, KY

Present: David Wilcock, Vara Lyngklip

Internet publication 12 / 02 / 03

[Note: Five single-spaced pages worth of complex, multilayered dream data has been omitted for greater ease and clarity in reading. Square brackets [such as those you see here] are editorial comments added after the reading. Words in normal parentheses (semi-circles as you see here) come from the reading itself.

David only retains small bits and pieces of memory regarding the content of any reading after he comes back to normal waking consciousness. As in every Wilcock reading, the Ra that is speaking here is filtered through the fifth-density male and female aspects of David’s higher self, the higher self of Vara Lyngklip (since March 2003) and that of the client. Thus this should not be seen as a straight continuation of the Law of One series, which moved directly from 6D to 3D.

This client expressed a strong desire for a monastic lifestyle and felt that the current life was “not spiritual enough” because of its degree of suffering.]

I am Ra. The channel is very good today. We greet you in the light and in the love of the one infinite Creator. Begin transmission protocols through entity David Wilcock.

The senselessness of malicious violence is well known to you when it is seen in the outside world. That which is on the docket for your own spiritual healing is to equally recognize the senselessness of the malicious violence against the self that has perpetuated. Ask yourself,

“Is it out of obligation that I felt this way?

Is it out of the sub-conscious lingering of the Judeo-Christian worship of limitations that says I must honor my father and mother?

If they do not approve of me, must I therefore not approve of myself in order to stay within their good graces?”

East meets West in the developing Wanderer personality. [A Wanderer is a human being who has an “angelic” soul that volunteered to incarnate here from higher dimensions, where the lessons of the “Earth School” have already been absorbed. Based on the figure of 60 million that was current as of 1981 according to the Law of One series, we estimate that there are now about 100 million such people on Earth today, or about one out of every 60 people. Most Wanderers never realize who or what they are within the human incarnation, though this client was starting to.]

Is it no accident, then, that the money that is gained is sought to be turned into a monastic existence and/or service to others in some form? In grasping for the experiential truths of life, one understands the mystery while not necessarily approaching the reality. It is possible, therefore, to learn the disciplines of the modern spiritual warrior. This is a soul who recognizes that the truest monastery at this time is found within the participatory nature of society, and of the struggle to reach for the lofty goals of the intelligent infinity. Within the constraints of living day by day, take special notice of the metaphors expressed in the dream of the entity David. Recognize that this wasteland of the spirit that you have been living in is clearing.

We seek harmony in the midst of change. We seek for you to learn ever more fully to embrace this change within yourself, to learn the comfort of recognizing that you are playing a planetary game and are not directly a part of it. At the same time that you are involved in the sense that you belong here, you are uninvolved in the sense that you volunteered to be here for a particular mission of service. The stirrings in the heart are for the remembrance of the One. There are definite discrepancies between the world that you remember and, “the world that has been drawn down before your eyes to blind you from the truth,” to quote that movie. [The Matrix]

Each passing day brings new opportunities to embrace the self in all its misery and confusion, for to do otherwise is to embrace falsity and illusion. In the healing balm of love comes the acceptance of the warts – the appendages that have not yet been sawn off, needless in their grotesque disturbances (we are speaking etherically here) - and the endless rows of fire hydrants yet to be pissed on by the animal self.

It is time to allow the great engine of the centuries to propel you through the initiatory process. The Hero’s Journey, as we have so often mentioned, involves moving through these trials, knowing all the while that any resistance that you are encountering is an embodiment of the aspects of yourself that, for whatever reason, you have deemed unacceptable, unlovable.

Make no mistake: you live in a holographic universe.

Make no mistake that if you have anger towards yourself, others will find ways to become angry with you - as if by magic.

If you doubt yourself, others will doubt you - as if by magic.

If you worry, others will give you things to worry about.

The Law of One perspective takes you outside the realm of form, you see. You believe that you have a physical body. You believe it be real, when in fact, the status of dreaming is closer to the Oneness, in terms of true reality, than your physical form. Even what you call your conscious mind is but a flutter of a butterfly’s wing, which does then form the cyclone on the other side of the world, so to speak.

Each action affects the entire universe in a rippling fashion. So you see, in moving through healing yourself within the world, and playing the planetary game, you are also healing all others playing the planetary game, including the starving children we mentioned at the end of David’s dream. There is an investment that is made into the collective consciousness of humanity when you move through these struggles on your own and arrive at greater understanding.

Bear in mind that we look favorably upon your progress. This was indicated by the levity and by the Christmas analogies [in the dream] referring to that birth that is coming within. The god Thor at the end of David’s dream [a huge, fearful image composed of brown clouds] was that which needed to be directly flown into. [David had to fly into the mouth of “Thor” in order to complete the major test in the dream. Only then did he see the starving children and reach out to them.] This is the confrontation with the shadow inside the self; the part that has felt the true meat of spiritual suffering, that knows the knife edge of pain, that recognizes the yearning in so many others because it has been felt and tapped inside the self.

In some ways you have tended towards a philosophy of not expecting anything from others, because therefore you will never be disappointed by them. From the core of consciousness, this enforces separation, for one could also say that by expecting the best from others, you will draw it out of them. Your expectations will in turn navigate a reality structure more in consonance with a true expression of divinity, as those desires move towards embracing self and embracing others.

You need not even look at yourself to practice self-acceptance. Simply work on accepting all forms of shadow that you see – in the greater world, in the governmental structures, the parts of yourself that felt you needed to become fabulously wealthy in order to help, and what would have been helped had that happened.

Recognize that the Earth is working along lines of curriculum that require these areas of imbalance. Many of those who have been called “banker bastards” are now reincarnating in desperate conditions in the third world with others who participated [in similar acts.] All souls have purposes for the choices that are made, and:

There is great beauty in the experience that most would call suffering.

For it is through suffering that the doorway to the Infinite opens up within the self.

You see, the monastic existence was not intended to be pleasurable on many levels; there is much to be given up – the world of the senses, the world of gratification, and in many cases, the world of human conversation. Solitude itself becomes the haystack needle so desperately sought after with such great futility. The more silence is sought, the more that the present circumstance offers no new stimulus, and the only resultant effect is to go over that which was in the past again and again and again – further refining and clarifying that which is known. This happens quite spontaneously, even if it is not desired.

This form of suffering was chosen for the very reason that the greater communities from whence the pilgrims would come were often quite harmonious. They were not burdened by the nine-to-five lifestyle, by the excess of technology, by rampant greed within their governments, etc. They came from relatively harmonious agrarian societies where there was good honest work to be done and long periods of rest after the harvest. Therefore, the need was created for there to be the introduction of difficulty into life where otherwise none would exist.

A life that is comfortable and serene and secure is not a very useful life towards one’s graduation.

Therefore, know that this process of harvest, or ascension, happening on Earth at this time has created, in a sense, the conditions of a monastic chamber of initiation across the entire surface of the globe.

The greater work is in balancing the self with all the megalithic advances in the speed and in the context of consciousness. Consciousness itself is evolving. The mental capacity of your peoples is evolving. The process of getting from here to there – in the informational world and in the physical world – is becoming increasingly expedient. To look within the self and to see what is there under the microscope is to stop whining about what is wrong, and to know that by looking at what is right, it is amplified and enhanced. [Hence,]

Confront the shadow directly as a part of yourself that has gained some degree of passion and pleasure from indulging in victimhood.

There is a payoff that is felt by the things that are wrong, by the things that are frustrating.

Deep, deep under many layers of conscious and sub-conscious lingo is the memory that you had at one time volunteered to be human, to enter into “this zoo, this prison,” again quoting from The Matrix. It is easy for you to forget that you volunteered to be here; it is easy to think that in some grander sense you have been thrown into this cataclysmic maze with the man with the knife who chases after you, or the beast, as such, [quoting from common ‘bad dream’ material.]

Whether it is bananas or coconuts, the tropical fruit of this mysterious jungle never quite seems to taste right in the mouth. We speak also here of the sexual appearance of bananas and coconuts and how confusing human interactions seem to be. Understand that beyond the pale lies the truth. The pale image of the present moment is but a surface skin; it is something you have created and painted as an artisan of consciousness.

Look to the many assumptions that are woven into this fabric of self.

Look at how those assumptions have been based upon feeling so alien in this world, as if no one understands you, as if no one is like you, as if you are all alone.

Deep down inside recognize how that feels as if God has abandoned you – as if you have been cast asunder into the garbage pit of the universe to sniff for maggots and shove rats to one side in the process.

It is only once you have been kicked in the dirt and tasted the gravel on your tongue that you may then have a desire to stand up and walk again,

knowing that with each step forward, the Earth is moving under your feet, rolling like the elephant-on-a-ball trick. The world walks with you; you are a part of nature. Everything is happening according to a grand plan, in which you are just a pinprick of light in your personality self, which is attempting to comprehend your true identity.

The true identity within you knows that it is not abandoned by the One Infinite Creator because it is the One Infinite Creator.

To assign the Creator a role other than yourself is to reinforce separation, to cast a shadow over your own process. For within the greater discipline of selfless meditation comes the realization that self is selfless: that what you have thought of as real, (as a self, as a personality,) does not exist beyond this level or this dimension. As you expand into higher dimensions, the grander scope of yourself comes into view. You can look at all the past lives together, you can look at how you scripted the various events in those lives with a definite itinerary in mind, and you can make further strides towards unifying with your own status as the One Infinite Creator.

Yet, you need not wait for ascension for this to happen – the ascension is now. The ascension comes when you embrace yourself without reservation or hesitation, when you learn that you are truly perfect and whole and complete in every moment, that you have never been abandoned, that all you need to do to feel that connection is to remember the Earth, remember the sky, remember the trees and know that it is all a part of yourself. This meditation can take you very far.

Think about the model of consciousness and of the universe constructed in David’s Convergence series of books. [LINKS: Book One, Book Two, Book Three.] Allow this initiated knowledge of the true essence of physical matter to inform your experience. As you know, matter is nothing more than coalesced light and consciousness. Therefore, it is also susceptible to the influence of consciousness.

You yourself can change the reality for all those on Earth by simply learning to love yourself unconditionally. This is the mystery-shrouded goal of all Wanderers: to come to this planet, to experience the disharmony and the chaos that has been created (as in the movie “Sphere” you mentioned) by the very perceptions of those entities themselves, and to weave a path through that misery… a path of love, a path of acceptance, a path of understanding.

There will be those experiences you will think of as suffering.

We would ask that you attempt to look upon them with a sense of humor and thanksgiving.

Each experience that drives you forward is yet another where the self is reflected to the self in all of its unadorned glory.

[It is an experience] where you can see beyond the shadows of desire and into the truth of your being.

In every moment, there comes the whisper-quiet revelation that you are the Light, you are the Love, you are the One Infinite Creator, now and forever.

[Note: Client begins audibly sobbing on the recording]

The lessons will come more quickly in the following year, as you know. We would remind you that we admire your progress; keep that in the forefront of your consciousness. We are very pleased with you. The objective now is to simply continue to follow your desire, to follow your bliss, follow that which calls to the highest and recognize that you can make no mistakes, for all experiences will cause you to grow and to learn and to unfold.

The intensive spiritual and mental work does need to be balanced with intensive social interactions, and that is another important point. Working through the social phobias is another very important and intrinsic quality in your healing.

More and more, you will see the self in others, and then they will not scare you as they are indeed quite familiar.

We thank you and want to remind you yet again that you are loved more than you could ever possibly imagine. We do eagerly await the time that you will approach the Throne of the Divine and sign your name upon the Akashic Records, thus freeing yourself from the obligations to third density and allowing you to move forth into those higher realms from whence you sprang. This is not only a promise: it is a real future that we see.

You can hold that energy of gratitude and self-acceptance even now, and know that the ascension is in every breath, in every moment and in every step that you take.

Be at peace and know that you are One.

We require one and one half minutes to reintegrate the consciousness of David into this physical form. We thank you for the time that you share with us, each time that you listen to this tape, and want you to know that we are never far from you.

Your higher self is right around the corner; all you have to do is be quiet and listen.

Be still and know that you are God. We thank you. Adonai and Amen.