on being true to oneself

[bjorn_nitmou]

--- in asc2k@yahoogroups.com, "david wilcock" <djw333@i...> wrote:
> - worked with known illmnti pop-music groups (as per whistleblower testimony
> i have seen)
________________________________
you have to give david credit for being able to see through some of these
shameful antics
that drake has displayed. by the way drake you should be ashamed for bank
rolling that
backstreet boy, boy band nonsense. that just shows bad taste in music.
seriously, i think
you owe everyone an apology.

[Monica Leal]

--- in asc2k@yahoogroups.com, "david wilcock" <djw333@i...> wrote:

> ... drake may or may not be
> in this category but i have never suspected anyone more than i
suspect >him right now, and i am not afraid to share that criteria,
even if it >makes me seem paranoid. i know a great deal about this
group and know >what to look for.
> ... it is certainly possible that there is no hidden conspiracy
going >on here and i am reading into something that is not there.

thank you david for acknowledging the possibility that you could be
wrong in your suspicions about drake. i think you are wrong. i think
you are reading too much into this and misinterpreting a great deal.

i will honor your wishes, david, and not dispute your conclusions
point by point. but i will say that many of the points you made about
drake are very distorted, in comparison to my perception of what
happened and my own conversations with drake.

i agree that you have been attacked by a major negative greeting, but
i think it's in the form of paranoia.

[Monica Leal]

--- in asc2k@yahoogroups.com, "bjorn_nitmou" <bjorn_nitmou@y...> wrote:
>by the way drake you should be ashamed for bank rolling that
> backstreet boy, boy band nonsense. that just shows bad taste in
music. seriously, i think
> you owe everyone an apology.
>

ha! that's great! yeah, really, i know of a lot better music you could
be supporting. ;-)

[David Wilcock]

from: asc2k@yahoogroups.com [mailto:asc2k@yahoogroups.com] on behalf of
petrus

hi david,

> dw: no need to fall upon your sword here, petrus, as some might see this
as
> attention-seeking behavior... which is not grossly immature, just gross!


>if i have any desire to seek attention, it is merely in order to
communicate
the statement that although i might be egocentric and contentious at times,
i'm *not* consciously/intentionally negatively oriented. although as you
say, some might claim that i protest too much.

dw: aww man... quite sorry my friend... you thought i was serious. the very
next sentence - which you unfortunately cut out here and that makes it look
far worse - started with "all kidding aside," where i was trying to make you
laugh.

once again, as we have all seen here, certain types of humor almost never
work in writing, even with smileys after the statement like i put in here. i
guess i have to be more respectful of the extreme sensitivity of some of our
participants here. it would be a lot easier for me not to participate as my
stress skyrockets now that i have to take all of this moving stuff to the
next level... it gets easier to write something without fully considering
the chessboard.

> jesus issue and i do need to let go of how intensely dissatisfied i have
> always been with churchianity and the cult of christ. see, that was
> passive-aggressive again. it's tough!

>i'd be a hypocrite if i had any problems with people who are dissatisfied
with the negative elements of formalised christianity, (as an institution)
as i have problems with that myself.

dw: i don't think anyone would be sticking around here if they did not have
such a problem.

>what i was seeking to clarify here was
that it hopefully be remembered that christ as a single individual is not
responsible for, nor should he be associated with (imho anywayz) the types
of outrages that some of the people who claim to be affiliated with him
commit.

dw: a point well taken, which feeds directly into the big thing that has
been on my mind these last few days.

this is precisely what happened to ra if you read the law of one series as
well... and in that case it quite literally created the ilmnti we have
today. all the core principles of this ilmnti are negatively-distorted
versions of what you can find in the law of one. this is very, very clear,
and i am currently engaged in some very unique research that only further
proves the point. i will speak about this when it is the right time, in a
tactful way.

ra majorly screwed up, by their standards, and are here now for karmic
atonement - but freely admit that they do not expect to succeed, and will
not succeed, until every earth human makes at least 4d level. there is
almost no doubt whatsoever that this will involve another planet that the 3d
cycle repeaters will go to. i do hope that i will not have to incarnate in
3d again on that planet as a wanderer, and internally i get that i will not.
many entities within the social memory complex have not yet wandered and
perhaps these "stragglers" have to do it in order for all of us to be able
to move on to the seventh density.

i do have a confession to make and this is not an easy one. those of you
following this list will probably recall a post not too long ago where i had
a full, astonishing karmic memory of exactly how unpleasant i got towards
the end of my life as cayce. granted, it has all been documented by harmon
bro and written up in reincarnation?, so this was nothing much of a surprise
for me to say... i was more just owning and calling attention to what was
already there, and that i had finally been able to vividly remember.

since i have been working really hard on myself, and my own issues, with
tons of private journaling as well as participating frequently here, i seem
to have broken through to a higher sub-density level of vibration as a soul,
which was very vividly depicted in a recent dream. i consider this to be
very positive - i have completed a major phase of my life, and of
initiation, and am ready to move on to higher learning. this is a violet
sub-density, wherever it may be in the octave system - i don't know.

however, as you get to that point where you really do flip into a
significantly new energy level, you are then offered even more distressing
things about your multidimensional self that you may never have been ready,
or willing, to see before. this is where you confront the "guardian of the
threshold," an aspect of your own shadow that is externalized into a form
you can see and interact with in the dream. i had a dream that blatantly
showed me that i'm now seeing something about myself that, if fully
understood, accepted and atoned for, could apparently lead to me being able
to get a taste of real seventh-density consciousness - the law of
foreverness rather than the law of one - while still here.

in short, i came to see that the same thing happened to ra-ta that had
happened to cayce at the end of his life. i would have never imagined that
when the law of one said that they "contacted one who heard and could
understand the law of one," which was a clear reference to ra-ta based on
the timelines under discussion and their correlation with the cayce
material, which the law of one validated as accurate, that this ra-ta could
also be the same human entity that they spoke of as one of the "priests and
peoples" who "quickly distorted" their teachings, "robbing it of the
compassion with which unity is informed." you just don't go there when you
think about things like this!!! surely it must have been people after ra-ta,
i always thought... without even a second glance!

the big bombshell that i've been dealing with these last few days is having
a sudden, very clear understanding that they were talking about ra-ta as the
first person to start this distortion in motion... and therefore talking
about my own apparent past incarnation. this has been quite the "piece" to
bear, and it just hit three days ago, two where i really got it. and you
wonder why i try to protect our list with guidelines and not let it steer
away from the law of one material, or distort the meanings of what that
material says... i have karmic memory of being in very serious trouble for
having let things spiral out of control back then, and do not wish to ever
have it repeat again.

so i am having very strong karmic memories right now of what happened when i
started to get really busy as ra-ta, and while i was on the road traveling
all the time, (i.e. what is about to kick into full gear once again in this
life,) people minding the temple of sacrifice and temple beautiful let
things get very distorted - they were, in the words of the cayce readings,
"turned into sexual playgrounds," but with the law of one context we can
also see that this must have only been one aspect of what had gone wrong.
and, as ra-ta, i never really was able to turn it back around.

even worse, i myself made directly self-serving choices that apparently
forced ra the 6d social memory complex to withdraw their influence from me,
and therefore from humanity at that time, in any direct sense. this is also
given in the law of one series.

my higher self had to break this to me gently, and not until i was ready to
take it without going into an enormous, self-damaging depression. i think
they waited until the first chance they had to hit me with this safely, and
now i've got it. the memory of a similar thing happening to cayce was what
let me get close to it, among certain other things that have come to a head
recently.

take this a step further and you realize that, in short, i could be the
"father of the ilmnti," perhaps the one person on this planet most
responsible for making bad decisions that, as they iterated after my own
death, ultimately led to the formation of a negatively-oriented body of
material that drives all the awful stuff we see going on now at the highest
levels of the negative elite. i have felt this way for a long time, though i
don't speak of it as it is far from an honorable thing, but now i feel as if
i really know that this is true.

the only consolation is in knowing that the negative elite are here for a
reason, and fulfill their job of mirroring humanity's shadow side back to
itself. one has to wonder, though, whether humanity would have become this
confused had the negative elite not been so well-informed. i don't know. ra,
in the law of one series, seems to imply as much, but perhaps at the 7d
level it is known that this is how things had to go down... and ra is only
just starting to see that now as they contemplate the full meaning of the
seventh-density teaching of "all things are perfect and sacred."

i had no idea what the consequences of these self-serving actions would be
at the time. i am only now able to start consciously remembering what i did.
it is staggering and, in a sense, terrifying to realize how far-reaching the
implications of such decisions can be, and of how much it weighs on you.
though we are moving into fourth-density here on earth, this certainly does
not mean that the same thing could not happen again this time around if we
are not exceptionally careful. i know that sounds cultish, but this is real
$#!+ we're talking about here, within the systems we are exploring. there is
a lot of responsibility.

upon learning of this, i have set certain things in motion to further help
balance that karma. one of them is to make damn sure that it is not starting
to happen here, and therefore to call out something that might be the
beginning of it - so at least it is put out on the table as a "dry run" of
what could actually happen, even if it is not real in this case. you should
be familiar with it because it almost certainly will be real at some point,
even if not now. i was told by more than one person that the are was
compromised back in the 70s.

i am fully aware that if this were happening here, and i called attention to
it, i could look very paranoid and even insane, creating all sorts of
back-chatter about how i'm under too much stress and blowing a few fuses,
and all the loving people who don't think things like this would happen
could basically condemn me for youthful insecurity and stupid fear... but
whether drake has any "agenda" or not, (and you notice we have not banned
him,) we all need to very soberly realize that this is going to happen to
us, and probably sooner rather than later. it could be someone that many
people support, a frequent participant that many of us know and love. it
could be... you! (cue twilight zone theme music.) lol!!!

when more people see what this film is really going to do, and how far it
could go, we will almost certainly be the target of "infiltration" efforts -
perhaps even those planned out on a very, very elaborate level with great
patience and sophistication. the ultimate victory would be if the moderators
were devastated, quit their jobs, and the infiltrator then took over, gained
trust, and began steering the moderation to highlight all the aspects of the
law of one series in the ways that were distorted by the negative elite.
hence all the first stages of this plan, as i had envisioned them, appeared
to be in the process of being attempted, and may have almost succeeded. even
if no one else but drake knew what he was really up to, just one person
being so goal-directed could be enough to pull it off.

so, all we have to do is not let the core law of one precepts be messed with
or altered, and keep our tried and true law of one scholars appeased enough
through careful moderation that they don't jump ship, and we should be fine.
if we did have someone like this here now, they would stick out like a sore
thumb and not get too far. such a "greeting" could only be fully realized if
we became more of a "newbie zone" where the scholars are not around and the
moderators had a negative agenda. i really don?t know how many of you guys
see what is at stake, for my own future karma as well as that of others, but
maybe now you start to get it.

another obvious, successful "infiltration" of my work would be if someone
could get their hands on the funding for the film, make us dependent upon
that funding, and then whip the rug out from under us so that the film never
got out of the can - and i ended up in la without enough money to afford to
stay and pitch it under new pretenses. i have always known that this is the
number-one best negative greeting that could happen since i started writing
the screenplay a year ago.

hence i have blown off any opportunities to get back on coast-to-coast this
whole year until i knew we had money in the bank and the film was a sure
thing. only then can we be sure we won't get messed with. it's about to
happen now, so expect to see me back on the show with george very soon. i
don't know what art's going to do after losing his wife.

since this film could do a lot to help humanity evolve, deactivating its
potential could have even more of a blast-radius than damaging this list, in
fact.

with drake we seemed to have the possibility of both greetings --
compromised list and compromised film -- being wrapped into one... which
would be a real dandy success, as even if one avenue failed the other might
still succeed. please don't be naãƒâƒã‚âƒãƒâ‚ã‚âƒãƒâƒã‚â‚ãƒâ‚ã‚âƒãƒâƒã‚âƒãƒâ‚ã‚â‚ ãƒâƒã‚â‚ãƒâ‚ã‚âƒãƒâƒã‚âƒãƒâ‚ã‚âƒãƒâƒã‚â‚ãƒâ‚ã‚â‚ムâƒã‚âƒãƒâ‚ã‚â‚ãƒâƒã‚â‚ãƒâ‚ã‚â¯ve enough to think that this kind of thing
never happens. there is a very real struggle going on in today's world that
neatly parallels cayce's description of the challenge between the "sons of
the law of one" and the "sons of belial."

again, i am fully willing to see that it is not going down like this, but
the bottom line is that no one can ever prove it one way or the other...
bummer, but true... so we just have to be allowed to do this list the way we
have decided to do it, and not be criticized for the high standards we
maintain to preserve the integrity of the material. i also am not accepting
any funding for the film from anyone who does not give me ample reason to
trust them.

now that i have put the pictures out there on the net, including the one of
gertrude / angelica / isris, that was apparently the gesture of my own free
will that finalized this stage of my initiation, so i could be presented
with this information. i was finally ready for it so that it wouldn?t
completely devastate me to learn it, but it has still not been easy. i
certainly would not share this information to try to make myself look good,
as it actually does just the opposite.

so then how in the world would ra-ta have let this happen? that's what we
will explore next, and i will write about it in first-person terms since i
am now remembering it as if it happened to me.

what i have been able to piece together so far is like this. we know from
the cayce readings that i had strong opponents in egypt, since we basically
invaded the indigenous egyptians and scared them enough with our army that
we had a bloodless political shift take place where i gained power as the
high priest and the king still maintained governing power, but was also
sharing it with me by my advisement. i knew we had to be there in egypt
because it was the most important grid node on the earth, the gravitational
balance-point for all the continents, and we needed to build the pyramid
there - at the "navel".

we know that my political opponents framed me into having sexual relations
with isris when i was already married to another woman. ra had taught
monogamy, one relationship at a time, as a spiritual path, and i accepted
the temptation of this really hot woman throwing herself at me and broke my
own teaching, through various justifications. the conspirators then got the
entire society to turn on me, clinton-style, and i was banished into exile.
i forget the exact number, but around 270 people went with me into the
desert and we were out there for several years, i believe.

it is possible that the 6d ra had already withdrawn their influence from me
by this point, because of this major betrayal of my own teachings i had
committed with the isris fiasco. remember - you get no law of grace when you
are in a position to fully understand how the law works. putting my hands on
that woman, and knowing i was betraying my own principles on some level in
the process but excusing my indulgence by mental justifications, was the
first real mistake i made. it apparently compounded and, at some point or
another, led to ra's withdrawal from the scene.

if this is true, then as per the rules of the game, the "good guy" goes away
and the "bad guy" comes in his place, acting and sounding the same as the
"good guy" but gradually working in new distortions, tempting your ego -
whatever it can slip past your personality self. consider the story of moses
and akunhaten (which i believe are the same person, though the law of one
does not explicitly state this since don never asked - but there are several
books out there that make a strong historical case for it) as another clear
example. i may post about this separately but basically moses succumbed to
public peer pressure for miracle-making, and confederation yahweh was
replaced by negative yahweh, which brought in the ten commandments and other
negatively-oriented teachings that still infect christianity today.

and think about it... unlike this one compartmentalized law of one series we
have now, which we know is solid regardless of what has been created after
it from myself, carla or anyone else, there you had the same person who was
continuing to channel apparently the same exact source. he could therefore
amend earlier statements, say they were distorted, et cetera and completely
obscure the original message. this time we can avoid that because the law of
one series is in a category totally by itself. conscious channeling is
invariably subject to conscious influences, hence both carla's q'uo and my
own readings always say to "throw away whatever is said here that doesn't
work for you."

so, out there in the desert, ra-ta was guided (perhaps by an impostor that
posed as ra) to build a pyramid... and he lived in it full-time. from his
own scientific knowledge taught to him by ra, (which i can validate now but
that is a long tangent we won't get into,) he knew that he was in a
time-reversing field while inside the pyramid, and that over time this would
actually reverse the aging process and revert his aging body to a fit,
young, amazing-looking body.

this is basically a technological "cheat" that creates an apparent miracle
not unlike the death and resurrection of jesus. it actually has nothing to
do with divine blessing or anything - it's just a scientific fact that your
age can be reversed if you spend enough time in a pyramidal structure.

6d positive ra would probably not have suggested that i do this... it was
fueled by a desire, however small, to gain "power over others" as a result
of being really hurt and betrayed by the banishment. that was how the path
to separation got started - by that feeling of total condemnation and
abandonment by society, through this awful conspiracy that framed me and
took me down.

cayce was still wrestling with this karma in his own life, and i would like
to think that i've made a lot of progress - but it is still unpleasant to be
so frequently held under intense scrutiny in order to participate on this
list in any fashion and keep fulfilling my purpose. if i get bothered too
much i just stop participating. who the hell wants to live a life where
you're constantly on trial? i'm not a figurehead here, i am a real person,
and i get tired of it.

so, when i had reversed myself in the pyramid to the point of looking young
again, we went back to the egyptian society, and by then people had really
missed having my influence around. the youthful appearance was seen as a
"miracle" and it put me into a savior-figure context.

apparently i did not do enough to try to knock that pedestal down, and even
ended up taking advantage of it to the point where i had multiple sexual
partners, wives, et cetera - basically a whole harem. this, too, is given in
the cayce readings. we can almost certainly be sure that 6d ra was long gone
by this time, as was just revealed to me the other day.

and if i could so brazenly break one of my own major rules, that set the
stage for others to take it in an even more negative direction; therefore 6d
ra's message was "quickly" "distorted by the priests and peoples" of the
time. quickly... as in, "the same priest we contacted started this in
motion... it didn't even have to wait until he was dead to get started." ra
never exaggerates when they say something in the law of one series, so
really think about the term 'quickly.'

in the big dream that showed me all this, i was not portrayed as a very nice
guy towards the end of my life as ra-ta, and that was a big shock. that was
the part i would not have believed had i not seen it myself. this came about
through the symbol of the ship's captain in the movie "serenity". it is
tough to take it in - but it helps to explain more of why an 11,000-year
karmic payback plan had to be put in place.

so i know that moderation sucks, and everyone's had their feelings hurt in
some form or another by it, but i do continue to feel that this is vastly
preferable to the alternative. this is our own temple sacrifice / temple
beautiful, and if we let it descend into chaos and do not maintain a high
standard, we could be replicating the same mistakes that created a "domino
effect" after ra-ta's passage.

i am way overdue for getting up from this computer, having dinner and
calling it a night as far as work is concerned... i hope this is somehow
useful to you in your own life and not just a rant.

peace be with you -

- david

[Michael Abrient]

> this has been quite the "piece" to
> bear, and it just hit three days ago, two where i really got it.


i found an article on the straight dope about cayce-- it wasn't too
flattering, and when i coupled it with other biographical stuff i had looked
at briefly, it left some questions in my mind about that last part of his
life. i mean, the straight dope is pretty hard-nosed anyway, and in this
case really heavy handed in dispensing with displeasantries about
"psychics". but... the reason why i went seeking it out was because this was
the same night you put up the past-life pictures. anyway, i was shocked you
came to these conclusions because, ere while, i had seriously thought about
posting my own questions then, no lie-- but decided against it for some
reason. these things are not easy.

i too have some karma attached to egypt, the pyramids (especially now that i
live in the same city as one), perhaps "set", and also the beloved, sweet
brotherhood and their more cold-blooded influences, somehow. my
understanding of it is vague, but there's probably a reason for that, too.

right now, i'm dealing with this father of mine, who is a preacher, in the
form of this divorce that's coming up, and basically coming to grips with
the extent of his sociopathic tendencies and how they were always there in
the past, in some form or another. to make a long story short, i honestly
don't know what dark circles he is dancing in, and where he is getting his
sexual addictions fulfilled-- but at the least he knows the difference
between right and wrong, he has to, but he has chosen to willfully pursue
what he knows is the worst he can do, and has warped his reality and his
mind so that... it's okay! it's all our fault. we should be happy for him
and the way he is.

twisting the law of one again.

uggh, but this isn't you, though. where were we...

anyway. either you're paranoid or everyone's out to get you-- not many
people realize the extent of infiltration in, say, the music "scene" in the
60's, the tangible result of which being a body count; decades onwards
notwithstanding, when the infiltration is just there, as the establishment
itself. especially in parts of california, hollywood, bohemian grove, etc.
like you said, it's what they do-- a good man dies or passes on, and they
leave their shill behind to hijack whatever's left. perhaps you did
contribute to the distortion of the law of one (it is so painful to say
that), but, too, it is also coupled with the inevitability of such a thing
happening, and also since it was you and you learned what you did and you
paid/ are paying the price, ultimately this is the best way for it to have
happened. and it is going to approach balance within your self, very soon,
like you said.

besides bel-air is named after... "beliar", the greek translation of
"belial"; or else, if i'm wrong on that, it just generally refers to a demon
of the air. but, in either case, be careful, david. if you indeed know that
your actions, as ra-ta, in one way or another ultimately created the
brotherhood as they are today, and you're going to have face the fire with
these guys and what you've set into motion, it is only fitting that you go
to their own turf, and pull this out of them. because that is what you will
have to do. and they won't exactly love you for it, but... hey, screw them.

or you could pull an alex jones and stay in the south, make a series of
independently produced documentaries, and stream them from your website for
free. i thought about doing something like that with music-- start a co-op/
non-profit, stay regional, and communicate what i feel through that avenue.
but i guess there's no avoiding taking that risk when you put yourself out
there like that, it's just an occupational hazard-- might as well go all
out.

stay safe, be love.

peace,
a


[non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[Petrus]

>whether drake has any "agenda" or not, (and you notice we have not banned
>him,) we all need to very soberly realize that this is going to happen to
>us, and probably sooner rather than later. it could be someone that many

i went to bed after writing my last post, and got some bad mental imagery
before going to sleep. i was also given the impression that by being on the
list at the moment, i'd got in way over my head. the exact thing was this
mocking voice saying, (mentally) "you're playing in a much bigger sandbox
now, little one."

>never happens. there is a very real struggle going on in today's world that
>neatly parallels cayce's description of the challenge between the "sons of
>the law of one" and the "sons of belial."

i read a book that had been put together once (many years ago) which
contained cayce's readings about the beginning of the world, among other
things...some really beautiful imagery. it mentioned this conflict, though.
the irony was i was at a fundamentalist christian's house at the time...it
was one night after a church service from memory. i had no idea that said
law of one was ra's material at the time though...wow.

>6d positive ra would probably not have suggested that i do this... it was
>fueled by a desire, however small, to gain "power over others" as a result
>of being really hurt and betrayed by the banishment. that was how the path

given the degree of ostracision which i've encountered in my lifetime, i
actually have to wonder why it hasn't successfully prompted me to go sts. i
think it's been a combination of empathy for others, and, if i'm honest,
fear of the consequences. i think more than anything though it's also what
ra said that of the two, sts is the option requiring the most effort...i'm
just too darn lazy for that degree of work. ;-)

[Jan Wicherink]

david wrote:

> i do have a confession to make and this is not an easy one. those
of you following this list will probably recall a post not too long
ago where i had a full, astonishing karmic memory of exactly how
unpleasant i got towards the end of my life as cayce. granted, it has
all been documented by harmon bro and written up in reincarnation?,
so this was nothing much of a surprise for me to say... i was more
just owning and calling attention to what was already there, and that
i had finally been able to vividly remember.

wow david this is some confession to make. i can see that it must
have upset you.
i'm sure that since you have become consciously aware of your cosmic
karma this time around, it will not happen again. i think we can now
all appreciate your vigorous attempts of keeping the law of one from
being distorted again, and you're right to do so.

i have a question maybe you could elaborate on the role of
moses\akhenaten a bit further. were you suggesting that moses was
actually accessing the same source ra? since moses was actually
teaching his people to worship one god only, he let them away from
the polytheism to monotheism. personally i have interpreted this as
the influence of ra on earth but i may be wrong

since there is so much similarity in the story of ra-ta, moses and
akhenaton, that i've been wondering if we are talking about the same
persons here? couldn't the ten commandments be distortions of the law
of one? according to howard middleton-jones, moses buried his ark of
the covenant inside the great pyramid. that would make him a builder
of the pyramid wouldn't it, another indication that ra-ta and moses
could be one and the same person.

maybe you could shine a light on the role of moses with respect to
the law of one, if there is any?

love
jan

[Pi]

thank you for sharing this most beautiful post, david! i beg your
pardon for anything herein that comes across as unsolicited advice
or criticism. my purpose is to mirror what i see within my self.

dw: the big bombshell that i've been dealing with these last few
days is having a sudden, very clear understanding that they were
talking about ra-ta as the first person to start this distortion in
motion... and therefore talking about my own apparent past
incarnation. this has been quite the "piece" to bear, and it just
hit three days ago, two where i really got it. and you wonder why i
try to protect our list with guidelines and not let it steer away
from the law of one material, or distort the meanings of what that
material says... i have karmic memory of being in very serious
trouble for having let things spiral out of control back then, and
do not wish to ever have it repeat again.

pi: it's not explicit, but i intuit you could be disposed to rely on
the specifics of your karmic memory in order to guide actions being
taken in the 'present' illusion. i see 2 points of relevance. 1) as
i understand the source in the cayce readings, the burden of karmic
memory is one that i / you / we all share, at least insofar as the
plight that humankind faces in this illusion. so plse go easy on
present self, dear david, for "you are not alone." 2) it might be
of consolation to remind self that 'the presentness' i / you / we
now face is 'in fact' an illusion; & since 'in reality' time does
not exist, let's use specifics of personal karmic memory as grist
for the mill of self-forgiveness. self-love, & forgiveness-love for
other-self & rely on further meditation to guide the present course.

dw: take this a step further and you realize that, in short, i could
be the "father of the ilmnti," perhaps the one person on this planet
most responsible for making bad decisions that, as they iterated
after my own death, ultimately led to the formation of a negatively-
oriented body of material that drives all the awful stuff we see
going on now at the highest levels of the negative elite. i have
felt this way for a long time, though i don't speak of it as it is
far from an honorable thing, but now i feel as if i really know that
this is true.

pi: i didn't extend your understanding as far as noted here, but i
did glean similar insight about the role of ra-ta about 2 years ago.
in reaction, i now ask, "was ra-ta making a free will choice? was it
a free will choice of other-selves to accept & follow distortions of
ra-ta?" if 'yes' is answer to each question, then why is anyone in
trouble as a result of a past event? the point then: "so what?"

dw: i had no idea what the consequences of these self-serving
actions would be at the time. i am only now able to start
consciously remembering what i did. it is staggering and, in a
sense, terrifying to realize how far-reaching the implications of
such decisions can be, and of how much it weighs on you. though we
are moving into fourth-density here on earth, this certainly does
not mean that the same thing could not happen again this time around
if we are not exceptionally careful. i know that sounds cultish, but
this is real $#!+ we're talking about here, within the systems we
are exploring. there is a lot of responsibility.
upon learning of this, i have set certain things in motion to
further help balance that karma. one of them is to make damn sure
that it is not starting to happen here, and therefore to call out
something that might be the beginning of it - so at least it is put
out on the table as a "dry run" of what could actually happen, even
if it is not real in this case. you should be familiar with it
because it almost certainly will be real at some point, even if not
now. i was told by more than one person that the are was compromised
back in the 70s.

pi: i agree, we must be diligent in order to assure that sources &
info on this site are consistent with loo. it would seem at least as
crucial to evolvement of soul for you / me / us all, to be sensitive
to potential risk of providing info / insight that could be used to
design a 'new & better' bomb or other device for controlling other-
selves & diluting the unity of the loo. in this regard, let's pray
for discernment...

peace & love, pi

[Monica Leal]

is drake an infiltrater or is david paranoid? i do not know. none of
us really know. only drake knows his motivation, and not even david
might be aware of the insidiousness of negative greeting in the form
of paranoia.

what attracted me to this group was that it was so positive. i really
appreciated how david was making such wonderful efforts to have hope
for the future, to see the shift as a positive thing, in contrast to
all the 'doom and gloom' psychic predictions out there. but now i am
seeing language in the form of fear, opposition, 'factions' and 'will
happen' - no probablity/possibility vortex here, but an absolute.

maybe drake does have a hidden agenda. i do not think so, but that is
only my opinion because i have read all those emails david has
referred to, but have a completely different interpretation of them.

regardless, drake has just been openly and aggressively attacked, and
even though david has acknowledged that he (david) might be wrong,
what people are hearing is the attack, what people are believing is
the attack. no room for trial by jury, no opportunity to hear the
other side (since any opposing posts might be censored, so we'll never
really know.)

i am saddened at what i am seeing here now. here is an excerpt from an
email that someone on this list sent to me privately:

"...i
have to admit, i dont know anything about drake so i
just took davids word on everything. maybe thats a
mistake on my part. i was just basing everything on
what drake said about the whole negative attack thing.
it seemd like he was irrationally trying to convince
everyone that they could never be negatively attacked,
so when i read davids response drake started to seem
like a pretty creepy dude. like i said, i certainly
rushed to judgement though, cause i dont know him..."

and this is my point. very few people actually know drake, and it
appears that they are just taking david's word for it. do you know
what that is, people? that is being sheeple. that is blindly following
your leader. last i heard, david did not want to be put on a pedestal.

again, maybe david is right about drake. i cannot say. but i do know
that there is another side to this story. i do know that there are
many points in david's analysis of the situation that i think he has
distorted out of paranoia. maybe i am wrong. all i am asking of you,
the participants on this list, is that you think for yourselves and do
not put david on a pedestal. that would be a huge disservice to him
and would be detrimental to his work.

all i am proposing is that you realize that when you start putting
david on a pedestal, and blindly accept his accusations of someone,
that is just like what the fundamentalists do with their religious
preachers.

this does not take away from my respect for david and his work. that
remains the same. so please, don't start telling me i am attacking
him. i'm not. if i am attacking anyone it is the people in this group
who are expecting david to do all their thinking for them.

undoubtedly i will now be ostracized for my honesty. but, david did
ask for honesty. so i am being honest.

i hope that this can be resolved and harmony can prevail. ra said the
most powerful protection is to be harmonious, loving and forgiving.

the boogey man is not in the form of an infiltrator or any particular
person. that is oversimplification, like bush labeling nations as
either 'good' or 'evil.' the threat is within ourselves. the love and
protection and forgiveness are also within ourselves. we must each
look at ourselves and see what this is mirroring for us, and that is
far more powerful than singling anyone out, whether it be drake,
david, or anyone else. and that is what the law of one is all about, imho.

--- in asc2k@yahoogroups.com, "david wilcock" <djw333@i...> wrote:
> those who attack invariably think it would be better if such "colorful"
> discussions were permitted, but that is because they resonate with
battle.
> we are attempting to create something that transcends the chaos of most
> forums - a virtual higher-density community, a modern mystery school
where
> you can be respected and honored if you're willing to do the work
and share
> with honesty...
>
> we can certainly also expect as my popularity increases that there
will be
> infiltrators who are paid to try to work their way in, and either
destroy my
> work

[David Wilcock]

from: asc2k@yahoogroups.com [mailto:asc2k@yahoogroups.com] on behalf of
petrus

>whether drake has any "agenda" or not, (and you notice we have not banned
>him,) we all need to very soberly realize that this is going to happen to
>us, and probably sooner rather than later. it could be someone that many

>i went to bed after writing my last post, and got some bad mental imagery
before going to sleep. i was also given the impression that by being on the
list at the moment, i'd got in way over my head. the exact thing was this
mocking voice saying, (mentally) "you're playing in a much bigger sandbox
now, little one."

dw: this is a negative greeting, as your participation, consistency and
unflaggingly candid honesty has actually been of significant value. in
general i want to thank everyone who takes the time to write thoughtful and
relevant posts here. i certainly cannot participate frequently enough to
cover everything, but i do at least make a go of it, within reason. i should
have time when i first get to la as well, since i'll basically be in
daniele's house most of the time and she won't always be there - but there
are definitely going to be some bald patches in the weeks ahead.

so, getting to the point, anyone can 'channel' positive or negative
entities; the whole point is that you have to learn to 'tune' so that the
thoughts and influences in your mind are only coming from the proper side of
things. this is why i was strictly instructed to never attempt channeling if
i was in any state of mind other than uplifting gratitude.

there was one occasion where i broke this protocol, tried to do it when i
was in tears soon after first moving to l/l and getting my buttons pushed
much harder than i had prepared for, (one part of this was that i was the
first human being to live for more than a few nights in law of one
questioner don elkins' room since his tragic death, and with how sensitive i
am, there was major uncleared energy in that room that i had to interface
with in the dreamspace) and i got messages to go back to va and stay with my
abusive ex.

at first i believed it... but when i would return to the line where it said,
"understand that you are a sinner in need of repentance," i soon realized
that this was a negative entity - a "christian demon", if you will - that
was playing on the same guilt my ex had tried to instill in me to maintain
control.

remember - positive entities do not tell you that you are a dirty sinner in
need of repentance - they acknowledge that you are here to have experiences
and learn from them. karma will happen if you violate free will, but you are
still loved in the process. this does not change the fact that we in the
human realm need to create boundaries and set limits on others' behavior, in
case any of this talk were to reincarnate the very, very tired old "asc2k
guidelines" discussion once more, which really should be conducted privately
with the moderators if at all.

so, this was probably the same entity that had been guiding her on how and
when to attack me, since her timing was a little too impeccable. the minute
i tried to do anything positive for this mission, she seemed to already know
and would create a massive drama.

this is where i basically got 'negative learning', like pavlovian
conditioning, that the entities wouldn't mess me up too badly as long as i
never really tried to do anything for my website - to "work towards not
working". what a confused mess that was. their game seemed too tight and i
did basically surrender for a period of time - but it was only because they
had a human window to work through. once i started to respect myself i
realized i could actually get away from the "window" - and they did not like
that one bit.

this entity knew these handy judeo-christian distorted catch-phrases that
are the product of negative influences overlaying jesus' positive ministry
and can shock good people back into line. that was all the proof i needed. i
got out of the relationship, did not move back to va, and only later on was
informed of what had happened and that i had done the right thing - but only
really in the sense of moving from one chamber of initiation to another that
was even more intense, and would get me a little more in the direction i
needed to go, forcing me to make realizations about my intense codependency
problem and the need to be my own person and have boundaries.

though i have written almost nothing about this publicly before, now that
i'm moving it's probably time to allude to something else that will help you
further understand my journey, so i can let go of it and not leave behind
any unfinished business of self-disclosure - so in case something ever
happened to me it has been documented. you may have sensed this from my
writings, but l/l was not two years of happiness for me, at all... it was,
in fact, the hardest two years of my life, a very intensely challenging
environment, where i felt that we were the outsiders in someone else's home,
with lots of very specific and time-consuming boundaries and expectations.

though it's not really a question of right and wrong, the bottom line was
that i had enormous projections of what a "monastic spiritual community
based on the law of one" would be like... including no central authority
figures, daily group analysis of dreams being equally as important as
meditation, no television watching as it creates "distraction, anonymity and
sleep", exceptionally pure diet and sobriety / abstinence from alcohol,
honoring of individual free will including long periods of unstructured and
unobstructed time as needed to get re-centered with one's own beingness
outside the typical dynamics of "the group", and trade-offs of who would be
the featured speaker for any given weekly group meeting, like we did at the
fellowship in virginia beach with great success... but this was not what
happened.

it became imperative to live in my own space if i was to really feel like an
adult and have the level of independence, free time and productivity that my
personality needed. not counting a few random gatecrashers, in the last
three years, eleven people showed up and moved in or intended to move in at
some point or another - in chronological order, it was myself, ed, vara,
gary, tim, bruce, mark, romi, melissa, ken and parnell. all were males
except vara and melissa, since some of those names may not be familiar to
you.

the average person did not hold up very long under the pressure - three only
lasted a few days and did not actually move in, two others only hung on for
about three months each. some of the departures involved the person feeling
extreme disappointment. for whatever reason, as i move on to la, the whole
thing seems to have basically completed a precise three-year cycle and drawn
to a close, returning to carla and jim alone in their own home again, except
for gary who hardly is visible now that he is so busy with 60 hour
workweeks, army reserve and a girlfriend.

vara, gary, myself and bruce were the true "core", sustaining the longest
between the house and the avalon property. in order of who has actually
lived in the main house the longest number of months, it goes vara, gary,
myself, melissa, bruce and romi. actually in real time actually spent living
in the house full time, i believe gary is now the record-holder, though he
got there later, because vara spent the warm months of 2005 at avalon.

i was the highest-paying, longest-lasting "renter," at 601 a month and 25%
profit share of my book and cd sales for 2 years, romi paid 600 for 3 months
and quickly moved out since there were 7 people when he was there, gary pays
his own rate and works off the rest with lots of household chores, vara did
not pay money but was singularly responsible for all the bookkeeping and
much of all the cooking, tim visited from australia and gave a nice donation
but did not actually move in, though he had considered it, bruce did not pay
but offered full-time construction labor and website work, and everyone else
who stayed for any length of time worked for rent as well.

i moved out here to milton, ky in october 2004, and provided bruce with free
room and board and a central point of focus for the avalon project, only
three miles from this house, so he could build it up without actually trying
to live out there. by the end of october it was possible to actually live
out there and he moved, knowing that i was going to be moving for the film
soon as well - though it has been significantly delayed by our own negative
greetings.

avalon has now been closed down due to lack of funding, and bruce is
finishing his move back to wyoming no later than april. vara was the single
longest-lasting volunteer in terms of how long she has actually been working
with the group in some form, and she has just moved out, as carla's online
journals reveal. gary is the only one left at the main house, but he has a
girlfriend and will probably move out pretty soon as well, i suspect.

i do remain grateful for having experienced the law of one legacy on a level
so few others will ever know or understand. this was the last time that i
could ever think of other human beings in a "heroic" way, and i very quickly
came to see exactly how human they really were: jim worked a relatively
normal job mowing lawns, with normal hours, he and carla watched hours a day
of normal tv including jim's obligatory sports broadcasts, they ate typical
food without anywhere near the restrictions i imposed on myself, everyone
would sink a few drinks here and there except jim, bruce and myself, and
there were all sorts of specific rules about how and when you were supposed
to do things in the house.

unfortunately, moving out did not do much. i still was constantly enmeshed
in l/l politics as the estranged, non-participating "satellite" member who
was providing bruce a place to live but did not want involvement otherwise.
i kept getting daily updates of all the interpersonal dramas, and was not
really separate from them. it was a great psychological relief when bruce
moved out as i finally could be david again, not "david, estranged satellite
participant in l/l research and the avalon project." i sent jim and carla a
really nice dvd this past christmas and got a nice letter back from carla
about a week ago thanking me for it, and that really helped me to let go of
the frustration.

i feel i am moving on with a clean energy field, and there is no doubt that
even though it was very intense and even debilitating (my involvement with
vara was perhaps the most challenging aspect, as we are very different
personality types - she is very counter-dependent and i was very
co-dependent and this blend was like oil and water), i am grateful for what
i learned. ultimately the initiation burned out all the parts of me that
might have ever wanted to seek personal grandeur as a channeler or
otherwise. if i even whispered something in that direction i would get taken
down to the mat so hard that i would be gasping for breath in seconds. now
the challenge is to actually build back some sense of value about what i do.


* * *

so, let's get back to the thread about using dreams for guidance. in my own
case, getting specific guidance from my higher self is a very tricky affair
because they can't spoon-feed me anything at this point. i can only get
hints and suggestions as to the best course of action. i constantly have to
be the detective, piecing clues together and trying to figure it all out...
and there's definitely a whole lot of that work to be done right now with
this move and all the politics of it.

this ongoing desire i have to know precisely what is best, in the eyes of
the higher self, at any moment, has made my analytical abilities very sharp.
i try to decipher these dreams every morning and try to obtain guidance and
direction from them. i see other people's dreams and it seems like a
preschool lecture on fingerpainting by comparison to the $hit i get. this
doesn't mean i don't love it... i am constantly being tested to the maximum
of my analytical abilities by my own higher self and it makes life quite
interesting.

this is just a daily reality - interpreting dream guidance - that i rarely
ever talk about here. i just consider it my job to put at least an hour in
on dreamwork every morning. i consider that anyone who is trying to do what
i am doing, and does not do this, can run into all sorts of trouble and
easily lose touch with what their higher self really wants. meditation is
not solely sufficient, in my humble opinion. the two were given equal
importance in the law of one series, when the question was actually posed,
and the cayce readings drummed it in with great repetition. dreamwork, for
me, is a stopgap against ever repeating my own loss of connection that grew
into view in other lifetimes, as i wrote yesterday.

to give you an example of the complexity i must go through to get
information, i got a symbol yesterday that indicated that this move should
not be too terribly rushed or else i will be building a shabby and unstable
new circumstance - shown as a building made with dark-blue components that
was put together much too quickly and very sloppily. the building had the
bluish characteristics of this short-term air mattress solution that i have
kept around and inflated for when i sell off my bed, and the shape of the
tarps on top of the house were almost identical to the shape of the logo on
the mattress.

the dream also made it clear that i needed to get out of here asap and start
the ball rolling. as i looked at this sloppy building going up across the
street from where i live now, which looked like it could fall down at the
first sign of stress, one of the kentuckian hillbilly workers came over and
lit up a cigarette right next to my door, flooding me with choking smoke and
stinking out the house. i also knew in the dream that i was not where i
needed to go - this was just a stopover point, even though it happened to be
my current residence at the same time.

there are multiple ways in which this symbol set could be interpreted, in
terms of where to live, who to live with, et cetera. you don't get a clear
picture, as the symbol set was not specific enough to be clear and easy to
interpret. it does seem to say "don't rush into anything," but also "get out
there now and don't wait around in kentucky any longer."

the benefits of the place in bel-air (it means beautiful air, not belial,
you guys, and is right at the base of some hilly mountains) is that it is
very well-located - i.e. i am not surrounded by heavy population on all
sides, but still can get everywhere i need to get quickly - and it is only
1k a month, half of what i had expected i might have to cough up.

one of the disadvantages, though, is that the current tenant does not have
to leave until feb. 5th - and my friend from denmark who set this up for me
is leaving the country for a month or more by next monday, so i have to get
out there right away if i want to seal the deal. [ah, and a 1:11 on that.
good sign that i'm on the right track.]

so, taking on this place could fit both sides of the dream's message - get
out there now, but don't rush into the first place you can slap together.
the 1:11 seems to further support all this. when i first heard that the
place was not available until february 5th, i said "there's no way i'm
waiting that long, no matter how amazing the synchronicities have been
leading me to this place. that's like almost three weeks away."

i really wanted to get this thing going and be out there by february 1st at
the absolute latest. yet this dream, about building a house so fast that it
gets shaky, is completely ridiculously poor in its construction and could
fall down at any point, may be suggesting that i should wait for the place
in bel-air to surface, rather than finding something that could be almost
twice as expensive on craigslist and crashing in just because i can save
myself a week of time in the process.

however, the other problem is that i might not be able to have a land line
there. if there is broadband internet that i can put in my name, (and there
would need to be, as i have to stay online,) then i can probably get "voice
over internet" or voip. if i can't have my own phone line there, either
through a land line or voip on the broadband internet, then it will have to
be a no go, as i absolutely will not cave to being dependent on a cellular
telephone - i am very highly sensitive to the microwaves they give off. i
don't even use cordless phones in the house - i walk around with a headset
telephone on a very long extension cord so i can go anywhere without
electromagnetic pollution. (bruce teased me endlessly about this.)

so, we'll see if it works out. it's a month to month lease that only lasts
until july at the latest, but it gives me a chance to save money for several
months and really figure out where i would like to go, and suss out what my
financial situation will be like in terms of what is really affordable.

this morning's dream was actually kind of a cool thing, as it blended
personal guidance in with atlantean memories. it seemed to be more new ra-ta
memories, in this case of traveling to mars in a ship with very advanced
computer technology to plot out a course, see it all in 3d and arrive there
in about as much time as it actually takes to plot the course. very natural.
in waking life, i have already figured out years ago that ra-ta had
discovered the martian ruins that hoagland has written so much about, and it
was a source of great surprise for the atlanteans. the cayce readings spoke
of this archeological breakthrough that revealed their past origins, but i
was the first person i know of to realize that ra-ta's discoveries were not
all located on earth. we know that the atlantean ships, by cayce's own
definition, were capable of traveling outside the earth's atmosphere, and
that ra-ta kept one around through most of his entire life for his own
personal use.

in the dream there were bases built on mars that i discovered, to my own
great surprise, but they were given in the dream as being run by the
russians. they may have actually been built by atlantean adversaries in the
ra-ta period; i am not sure.

the bases i flew into in this dream were built near the south pole, before
the icecaps got started. there were several of them and when we discovered
them it was an outrageous surprise. i tried to infiltrate the main base but
was captured by the russians almost as soon as i got there. they put me
through some sort of sisyphus type of torture, where i had to keep moving up
and down a dark elevator shaft tilted at a 45-degree angle, like i was on a
ski lift. other chairs on the lift had enormous amounts of food, but it was
set up so i could never reach them, and i got hungrier and hungrier as this
cruel torture went along. i eventually figured out how to bust out of the
chair, feed myself and escape.

so as far as dreams go, since mars is the planet of war, and the
45-degree-angle chamber is the pyramid's initiation chamber, i would take
this dream to reflect negatively on my desire to participate in drama on
this list. yesterday i stayed at the computer for so long trying to resolve
this issue that i never ate anything except breakfast, and actually crashed
out almost as soon as i got done, just nibbling on a few grapes before i
passed out.

it would have been really nice to eat lunch or dinner yesterday, as i did
have things in the refrigerator ready to cook, but i never got around to
it... as this issue was oh, so important to take care of first! so in the
dream i was imprisoned near the "south pole" of the planet of war, right
next to the cold ice, stuck in a repetitive loop, and though food kept going
by i was never able to grab it. only when i started to think innovatively,
figured out how to break out of the chair lift and move around in the shaft
could i then move on. as it is, right now i still haven't eaten anything
either, so this needs to end soon.

it is quite amazing to have suddenly uncorked the bottle of ra-ta memories
and have them floating back. i have basically been waiting for this to
happen ever since i first learned of the connection, and finally it has
become available. for that i am grateful as my readings have wished this for
me for quite some time, but i felt completely befuddled as to how to
actually achieve it. either you remember or you don't.

so getting back to petrus' worry about negative greetings, again, think
negative thoughts and negative entities will be there to amplify their
intensity. i would recommend not worrying about it. the only person here who
might be in any potential danger is myself... but the machine is big, dumb
and slow, and it is only the illusion of its power and control that keeps
people in fear. there is a great deal of protection that comes to you if you
run a clean game, and if you are not trying to do something as public as
what i am doing, then you will not have to go through anywhere near as much
severe initiation as i have endured.

ok, i definitely stink, in the physical sense of the term, and my feet are
numb from cold... so this is it. i think i'm going to do some serious
packing today and advance the curriculum forward...

peace be with you -

- david