Am I The Only One Having A Really Rough Time?

[Allan Birdsong]

I consider myself a wanderer type and have been aware of it pretty much my whole life. About four years ago I was making really good spiritual progress. But times got tough, the hits kept coming and I became severely depressed. What some would call a 'Dark Night of the Soul' fell upon me, where, as Ram Dass would say - God takes off the training wheels.

I do feel optimistic about changes. I've subconsciously been aware of a coming major shift since I was a small kid. But I'm so impatient with people lately and I lose my temper so easily. I feel like any progress I've made has been scrubbed clean and now I'm just a very angry, ineffectual, testy 31 year old man who's so sick of being in debt and sick of the whole system.

Is anyone else out there just having a terrible time? I'm trying to stay positive, but it's very difficult these days.

[saffire]

I consider myself a wanderer type and have been aware of it pretty much my whole life. About four years ago I was making really good spiritual progress. But times got tough, the hits kept coming and I became severely depressed. What some would call a 'Dark Night of the Soul' fell upon me, where, as Ram Dass would say - God takes off the training wheels.

I have been feeling some of the same things. It seems that everytime I learn something amazing then something really challening or annoying comes along. I'm not sure what to make of this. It almost feels like I'm being attacked when I make progress? Maybe I should think of it more as a test? As soon as I get through a certain issue another one will pop up in its place I guess being a wanderer is not meant to be easy.

- saffire

[EcyaC]

...Is anyone else out there just having a terrible time? I'm trying to stay positive, but it's very difficult these days.

[In the process of writing this to you I happened to glance at the clock, for just a second, right when it went from being 8:00 to 8:01!?]

You probably get angry easy because you're a meat-eater. You're probably depressed because of your diet and not getting 14mins of direct sunlight daily and not drinking enough of the right kind of water and not getting enough physical contact...

Keep in mind many are sick of being in debt, and many are in it a lot worse than you, and practically everyone is sick of "the whole system" given it's corrupt.

I think having a rough time, at a time like this in history, is very healthy/mature. We know you're not constantly having a really rough, and terrible, time, though, as this is impractical.

"There is no try, only do." My advice is to quit trying to remain positive, since this is impossible, and just have faith you're probably always feeling how you're meant to feel.

Every moment is a present/miracle of your own making, likely crafted to make you stronger than you can imagine.

Remember... "Divine Intervention" implies the cosmos aren't, constantly, divine.

If you keep up with the recent crop circles, and get synchronicity, it's kind of hard not to mostly stay optimistic and positive and to often recall all is, always, well/divine.

[Enki Eli 08 03]

Oh yes!!

Whole my life! I think you´ve blessed by seeing both sides of the stories and it is really disturbing on a long run, if you are surrounded with nonloving needy people.
I`ve eaten meat throughout my whole life, until 1 month ago. I highly recommend changing your diet.. My solar plexus doesn´t hurt no more and im more strong to upfront my daily issues.

I couldn`t believe by changing my diet, i would feel so much better.
I thought it was me, just getting angry and unpacient, but now i can see the change in me.
You should seek help in Reiki and cleansing, to help you start feeling better.

I`ve always seen myself as a sponge, sucking all the negativity around me and keeping it myself. Take it, Analyze it, Throw it!
Try seeing more angles on things and try analyze different. By holding all that inside you`re not fair to yourself and that´s why you feel ****. Strop carrying the world on your shoulders and take a smaller piece for a starters. Im 31 yrs old too and propably going through same issues.

Use your intelligence to change your thoughts. Try finding humour in things and laugh! Love and forgive. and i promise, that you`ll feel the change inmediatly.
I mean, i´ve been lost for a long time, but only one session opened my eye and connected me with myself again.
All the best!

[grod86]

I've been that way the last 4 months, but I found it to be do to the people I surround myself with. Although all the anger comes from within, those who are around you can expose your real level of acceptance. I also went on a path of enlightening, when i thought I was ready to spread the word and what I have gained. I learned that the word I received was not yet whole and not ready to be released. This led to frustration, anger and feelings I didn't want to feel. I then learned that your never complete until your complete, Always grow and build and never think you have reached your highest point. Everyone if they tell you or not feel the frustration at some point they may go on long stretches without it but It finds a way. Its OK to feel frustration cause the one who do not is the one thinking he is Almighty.

[cameronjcw]

I used to be really angry and short tempered, wasnt always like that but seemed to go that way and it just got worse but then I got sick andit stopped me in my tracks and a few years later Im no longer angry. Ive realised that its pointless getting angry at so many things when you cant do much about them and really in the grander scheme of things they dont matter so much. I think the one thing thats changed is not situations or other people but my reaction to situation and other peoples behaviour, still get angry now and then but nothing like the way I used to at all.

I think regarding the system, we are all stuck in this system which is rapidly dying and its somewhat dragging some of us down. I think it might be that a lot of people are subconsciously afraid of the changes that will come with the collapse which seems imminent!!

We are on the cusp of some very big changes and have been for a while! I think sometimes teetering on the edge of this for so long can make us impatient and short tempered but really all we can do is try and relax and go with the flow.

I really think if you are in your current mindset it might be helpful for you to try and slow down and have some thinking time out from all the stresses, a few hours medication or relaxation, even if you cant get into a deep medative state where you are thinking of nothing isnt a bad thing I dont think anyway!! If you are lying there thinking of absolutely nothing you wont have the discussions in your head with yourself that you need to move forward!!

I think when we are so stressed out that we are exhausted and sick and cant sleep, lying in bed at night with your thoughts racing is the perfect opportunity. These thoughts will never go away until you have sorted them out with yourself. Sometimes I think when things are going wrong or you are getting sick this is your body and minds way of telling you to stop, take stock, explore your own psyche and try and understand it and much more will make sense!!

If you know what I mean??

[Allan Birdsong]

Good stuff, yes. I do think part of being a wanderer, or an indigo is there's an anger at how poorly other people are behaving and running things. It's how we channel and properly use that energy that reaction that counts.

[Dennysp]

I was stuck in a cycle of negative emotions, which even my energy healing wasn't able to clear completely. I purchased a couple of orgone pyramids from Fifth Element Orgone, and they have helped tremendously. I compare them to air purifiers, passively cleaning the energy.

[Uzbazbiel]

I consider myself a wanderer type and have been aware of it pretty much my whole life. About four years ago I was making really good spiritual progress. But times got tough, the hits kept coming and I became severely depressed. What some would call a 'Dark Night of the Soul' fell upon me, where, as Ram Dass would say - God takes off the training wheels.

I do feel optimistic about changes. I've subconsciously been aware of a coming major shift since I was a small kid. But I'm so impatient with people lately and I lose my temper so easily. I feel like any progress I've made has been scrubbed clean and now I'm just a very angry, ineffectual, testy 31 year old man who's so sick of being in debt and sick of the whole system.

Is anyone else out there just having a terrible time? I'm trying to stay positive, but it's very difficult these days.

May I take a wild guess and assume that you have fears about your future survival? Anger is always the result of denying an underlying emotion such as fear, grief, or shame. Men are famous for denying emotions but then they are also famous for getting angry vs. feeling their emotions like women do.

What is happening is the law of attraction is acting upon your soul. You have fears in your soul and those fears attract events into your life so that you may clear those emotions (beliefs embedded within feelings). The intelligent course of action to take is to clear the negative emotions out of your soul so that you stop attracting events which make you feel stuck. The law of attraction is a universal law created by god to help you get to know what is going on in your soul so that you can choose to heal. To heal all you need to do is feel the emotions and let them pass through you till they are gone. The next time you feel angry try to recognize that you are angry and instead of staying in the anger choose to feel the underlying emotions. You will soon figure out what that emotion is all about after you get into the emotion. Then your life problem is solved and you won't need to worry about those types of frustrating events in your life manifesting anymore.

[billybobbutterball]

Seems that taking the spiritual journey finds a path cluttered with frustrating obstacles that smear the traveler with great globs of sticky black depression.
Some of the stories in this thread certainly illustrate that reality.

How does one manage to keep their balance in following the Yellow Brick Road?

Well, here is a bit of good advice for your contemplation.

Daily Meditation: Monday, July 30, 2012.

"In the morning when you watch the sun rise, tell yourself that
the rays of light that fall on you are living beings able to help
you solve the problems the day brings – but only today’s
problems, not tomorrow’s. Tomorrow, you will have to go and
consult them afresh and, again, for just that day. The answer
these entities give you will never be for two or three days
ahead. They will say, ‘No need to provide for more than a day.
When you come again tomorrow, we will give you an answer.’
We eat every day, and we do not fill our stomach with a week’s
worth of food, only with enough for the day, and the next day we
start again. Well, this is how it should be with light, for light
is food we must take in and digest each day, so that it can
become in us feelings, thoughts and inspiration. Why do people
not use the same logic with regard to light as they do to food?"

Omraam Mikhaël Aïvanhov (Prosveta

It is no secret that I'm a fan of Omraam -- ever since 2005 when a reader posted one of Aivannov's meditations on what was the predecessor to Divine Cosmos, ( birthed in 2007)

In a recent selection, Aivannov pointed out the subtle dangers in letting one's guard down via indulging in negative thoughts -- This is the problem...Seems that there is a whole host of nasty beings on the other side just waiting for an opportunity to 'play' havoc with one's emotions. When you find yourself wallowing in a case of despondent blues it could well be largely the product of one of the aforementioned, negative biased Ethereans.

Trying to live in the light...BBB (where the heck is the d.....ed switch!!!?)