Integrating non-believers

[eskmo]

>on 3/30/04 12:58 pm, jeremy weiland at greenlantern113@... (/group/asc2k/post?postid=ixnhki8os2kdsqkfolhyzi7j7d4hymr3aszulr dabzstycoae6mbwnzm-hyr3wly-_w9jqfeyazwyixav7dq) wrote:

>sometimes people drift away. good luck.


abosolutely. i also have gone through this type of experience andrew.
concering the seperation betweens certain people around here and myself.
jeremy made some good points - also i wanted to say that u can follow your
gut to where it points.

for me personally, i know as i grew and continue to grow into a new
thoughtspace, then those types of energies that i'm yearning for come closer
- but only if u allow them to. i'm sure you'll be able to meet new people
but dealing with the seperation from the previous ( thats if u do in fact
choose to make them previous) - is just part of the growing process.

take care
brendan

[drewez1981]

dear jeremy and all,

> > the hardest thing is, how am i to explain this to my
>
> > family and friends who are concerned about me?
>
> explain to them what is going on with you in terms
> they will understand an accept. the transient details
> are not necessary - to say that you are reevaluating
> your values and priorities is a normal, human process,
> and all you can do is appeal to that human experience
> that you share. of course, this means that you won't
> necessarily be allowed by your friends and family to
> share the details of your world view, but you have to
> ask yourself how important the details are if they
> estrange you from others rather than bring you closer.
> we all have limits to the information we can
> integrate.
>
> jeremy


thank you jeremy for these words of wisdom as they are helping me
with an issue that i am presently dealing with.

i feel totally torn in regards to my relationship with some of those
close to me (some family but mostly friends). they do not seem to
understand the reasoning behind my beliefs and actions and they
don't really seem to care either. all they see is that i am
becoming more and more distant from them. they see me becoming more
reclusive and isolated. it is true that i do not participate in
their social activites (bars, drinking, etc.) as much as i used to.
i often choose to meditate and do research instead. thier ways of
behaving are not really admirable and often i'd rather not be with
them at all.

i try to explain that i have changed and that those things do not
appeal to me much anymore but they respond with arrogant ridicule
and a "you're wasting your life" attitude. they say that i'm no fun
anymore and it hurts.

but the catalyst they present is enormous and is a huge opportunity
for growth. i am getting a lot better at making them understand the
choices i am making and integrating their criticisms rather than
rejecting them. but i wonder though how can i prevent distancing my
self from them considering the alienation this situation presents?

thank you jeremy and all for all of your insight.

loving regards,
andrew

[Jeremy Weiland]

> they do not seem to understand the reasoning behind my beliefs and
> actions and they don't really seem to care either.

i run into this a lot. i just try to remember that, if i want others
to respect my opinions, i have to respect theirs. to expect others
to respect your beliefs just because they are yours is unreasonable,
i think, though i do it all the time. if you expect people to
respect your beliefs, you're probably going to be disappointed.

it usually causes me distress when others reject my beliefs - until i
remember that there are things they care about which don't matter to
me. friendship comes from respecting persons because of who they
are, not complete agreement of opinion. in that sense, beliefs are
one more form of superficial identity, imho. you don't need their
permission to hold opinions, nor do they need yours to hold theirs.

> all they see is that i am becoming more and more distant from
> them. they see me becoming more reclusive and isolated. it is
> true that i do not participate in their social activites (bars,
> drinking, etc.) as much as i used to.

all i can say is that you should keep the doors open - sometimes when
we discover beliefs that we hold deeply, we can be judgemental of
those who don't hold them. you should respect the freedom of your
friends to spend their time as they like, and if you are indeed
withdrawing from them out of disapproval, you might want to take a
look at that - just because they're drinking doesn't mean you need
to. also, make sure it's not *you* that's making your beliefs an
issue (by talking about them all the time, for instance).

on the other hand, understand that some may choose not to walk in
those open doors. if they don't value their friendship with you
minus the superficialities, you have to ask yourself what kind of
friends they were in the first place.

basically, you have to ask yourself whether you're growing apart or
pushing them away.

> i often choose to meditate and do research instead. thier ways of
> behaving are not really admirable and often i'd rather not be with
> them at all.

well, there's your answer. no need to judge their behavior - just
allow yourself to find a new situation that is more comfortable. do
you feel you owe them something?

> i try to explain that i have changed and that those things do not
> appeal to me much anymore but they respond with arrogant ridicule
> and a "you're wasting your life" attitude. they say that i'm no
> fun anymore and it hurts.

these people are your friends? if it were my friend that was saying
the things you're saying, i might be concerned, but not angry.

> but i wonder though how can i prevent distancing my self from them
> considering the alienation this situation presents?

if these are friends you really want to keep, then just be a good
friend by being yourself and nothing you're not. if that's not what
they want (if they're only interested in you as a partier, for
instance), then there's really nothing you can do about it.
sometimes people drift away. good luck.

love and light,

jeremy

[Gail Petrie]

dear drewez1981: i don't post often and won't be for a while as am going out of
town in the morning. i went through quite a period of isolation with both my
friends and my family during a time when i was spiritually unfolding. i know
what you're going through all too well. one of the constants of this life is
that changes. sometimes changes include changes in friends as well. continue
to stand in your own intregrity and in the truth of who you are! be true to
yourself. perhaps this is an opportunity for you to explore/work on "self"
issues. in my own case, many of my friends and family "came back to me" when
they started seeing the positive changes in me and in my lifestyle...they don't
always understand it and really most aren't interested in the "what, when,
where, how, whys of it", but all the same, they comment often things like "geez,
i don't know what shes doing but whatever it is it sure agrees with her" and the
like. also, you will make new friends and find new
support systems in your journey. blessings -- gail

[Seek Up]

man, andrew, your post is pulling me to say something in a million different
ways? it echoes much of a process that i went through not too long ago that
lasted several years: my own catalyst of separation from my then friends (whom i
grew up with) and the pain that results from that drifting. i don?t know the
details, the names, the particulars of your situation, but i feel a resonance in
shared experience here.


>i feel totally torn in regards to my relationship with some of those
>close to me (some family but mostly friends). they do not seem to
>understand the reasoning behind my beliefs and actions and they
>don't really seem to care either.

i assume that you have tried to explain to them all the wonderful things you are
discovering on your inner travels and within the books that are opening your
eyes to worlds that are so ?new?, and yet so familiar?

i believe it is common simply to desire to share the personal discovery of
something that may not *answer* all of life?s questions, but certainly does give
you more hints and clues than did the former body of information offered within
consensus reality; not only a discovery of information that fills in some of the
gaps, but information that helps to point the way and set you upon your path of
self-discovery to answer those questions. questions you will find your friends
aren?t asking.

to me, the best experience in the world, is a shared experience. be it a good
movie, a good restaurant, or a great album. that desire to share, imho, is very
present when one begins to find their spiritual feet and uncovers goldmines of
information that just begin to answer questions of a lifetime that you may or
may not know you?ve had? but, that desire to share in communion with another, is
not always best followed when it comes to ideas about the creation of the father
? as it more truly is ? as opposed to the creation of man, (which most are
hypnotized by and give identity to). **especially** when those beliefs (which
i?m assuming are grounded in the law of one) speak about densities, wanderers,
and extra-terrestrial aid to planet earth in her past and present? : )

sometimes, on issues such as these, it is best to keep it to oneself. let the
information distill within you, open your heart and mind further, and aid you in
being of better service to those about you. what you may want to share is not
your books, per se, but the love and acceptance you are able to radiate because
of your diligence in knowing and accepting yourself ? guided by your heart and
desire to seek. share the fruits of your seeking, your higher vibrations, that
is.

(dude, i have so much to ramble on about because of your post, so please forgive
me because i will take up some ?k? here.)

in my case, i found soo much information about the universe that we live in ?
through books, websites, and the like - that was filling me in ways that nothing
material ever had. i thought it should be just as exciting, enriching, and
satisfying to others around me. you know, something works for you, so you want
to tell those that you love and say, ?look at this! read this, and you?ll see
what i see? you?ll see that there are answers. there is a way. there is a
reason!! there is meaning, and work to do, and a plan? and most importantly, a
creator? and it?s all about loovvee!!?

so i tried to give books to people, channelings, website links? my batting
average was nothing to be admired. so far i?ve learned that a listening ear and
caring heart are usually of far better service then a thesis on what it is you
believe and why you believe : )

many people i?ve met seemed to have dulled and even turned off their inner
senses and desires that seek to know the mystery which they are heirs to. to
personalities unaware of their own soul, stuff like this, isn?t going to fly too
well. why? fear on some level, i suppose, though i could be wrong.

the difference between sleeping through life and awakening to true life, or,
unconsciousness and becoming conscious, may become more pronounced to you and
the conceptual and emotional ?distance? between you and your loved ones, may
grow as you become more dedicated to your unfolding journey. your universe will
shift and what was once important to you (as you were writing about) may seem
trivial and completely lose your attention. this is to be expected. as you stick
your head in your books and research, and continue to ?tabernacle? with the
infinite one in meditation, you will develop an entirely different and heart
centered way of seeing things which will necessarily bring with it a whole new
vocabulary! unless, as jeremy was saying, you learn how to speak to others using
their own native (english) language and symbols, they will not be able to
comprehend your ra-speak. they may even react with contempt, criticism, and
other forms of fear.

be honest with yourself though and ask if what you seek to share with them is
motivated by some desire to *justify* your new identity and your worth. if you
are indeed doing this and placing the legitimacy of your heart in others hands
for their approval/disapproval, you?re setting yourself up and the pain will not
decrease until you can learn to love yourself, and them, for who you and they
are - without needing their okay for your way. we all need validation from
others at different times, i?m not free of that distortion. just try to know
that being is its own justification?

>all they see is that i am
>becoming more and more distant from them. they see me becoming more
>reclusive and isolated. it is true that i do not participate in
>their social activites (bars, drinking, etc.) as much as i used to.
>i often choose to meditate and do research instead.

ha ha! i could have written this myself! my group was a bar going/partying group
in which my identity and sense of belonging was derived. my life, its values,
distortions of correct/incorrect behavior all derived from what i perceived to
be their opinions and their ways to live life in this world. i began to enter
into the same process of walking steps in a direction away from the bar that
lead not *to* any place without but rather, within.

i just gradually began to lose interest in the habits and social activities of
my friends (and some family) which before had motivated me and defined my world.
more and more i began to feel a need to change, a growing drive to better
myself, to heal, to unblock blockages, to acquire knowledge on matters of the
spirit that i could soak up, to *understand* my self and the universe in turn?.
to figure out what the freak was ?wrong? with me, who i was and how i even came
to be that way ? losing one identity and building the foundation for a new one.

andrew, imho, that foundation is built upon a lot of confusion, unknowing, and
inner turmoil. it takes many leaps of faith to trust that you have placed
yourself exactly where you need to be, experiencing what you need to experience,
and with the skills and resources to learn from you life, open your heart to the
most challenging of circumstance, and grow amazingly from a whole lotta
cluelessness.

i?ve been where you are at now dude. i wasn?t the first, and you won?t be the
last. as i understand it, many have gone through this as they have awakened from
the dream of the personality, to the greater dream of the soul. it is nothing
new and is a process that if you are not currently grateful for, you will
eventually look back bless and thank it all for offering to you the lessons you
needed to find and live your inner light.

some people are born with some degree of knowing in who they are and thus make
no great dramatic 180?s from a materially based life to a spiritual one. when
you?re not one of those souls and you?ve been chasing after the illusions others
built; when you took your cues of what was real from their actions, the inner
alarm clock which wakes you up from all of that isn?t the most comfortable and
pleasant of sounds. but somewhere inside, you do know it is time to wake, begin
a whole brand new way of life, and, try as you might to avoid it by hitting that
snooze button (in your attempts to turn back to the ?old? ways of living), you
will wake and stand up on your own two feet of self-knowledge to do the work you
felt was necessary before incarnation.

>thier ways of behaving are not really admirable and often i'd rather not be
with
>them at all.

in discovering who you more truly are, you will find many things which you are
not? er, more correctly, many ways in which you don?t wish to use your free
will? which may include the old social ways of friends. in disidentifying from
the realities of old, keep in mind that what you?re trying to do (if you?re
following ra?s guidelines) is to accept all things? which does include your
friends? behaviors? so keep a sharp eye on that beast of judgment within that
leads to bitterness : )

>i try to explain that i have changed and that those things do not
>appeal to me much anymore but they respond with arrogant ridicule
>and a "you're wasting your life" attitude. they say that i'm no fun
>anymore and it hurts.

my humble advice: stop trying to explain. i would bet that your battles of
?explaining? continue on in the mental thoughts and dramas inside your head long
past the last conversation you had with an antagonistic friend. in this
particular catalyst, the point is not to justify your path and your wonders to
those you can no longer connect with? no, i believe it has another reason for
being in your life pattern. ask yourself why you feel the need to explain to
them and seek their acceptance of it. feel the emotions involved, watch the
thoughts that cycle round and round this catalyst between you and they? with
enough time and growth, it will lead you deeper within? exposing layers
underneath these situations where secrets to your identity lie.

there was a statement that has given me strength and the will to continue to
walk in different moments that i picked up from scott mandelker?s book,
universal vision. your story reminds me of it. i just went to look it up in the
book (its been a while) and there is actually a chapter titled ?standing alone.?
i?ll type up an excerpt for you:

?we can also look at the spiritual path in another way. the higher you go, the
smaller the crowd! ? the more effort we put into self-cultivation, the more time
we spend in meditation, study, service, and reflection, the more we do tend to
split off from the main body of society ? though spiritual dedication generates
more compassion, desire to serve, and a sense of unity, it generally separates
us (at least in awareness) from our peers. to boldly turn towards spirit, at
least here in 3d, usually requires us to turn away from the world ? at least for
certain periods of time ? and learn to stand alone.?

good book if you have an interest .the catalyst and challenges they present you
as you attempt to explain this new identity of yours may also just be beneficial
because it helps you to verbalize what it is that is so important to you and
consequently helps you to better define yourself and what you are doing with
love and light meditation/research ; )

and on the ?not being fun anymore?? i?m not any fun anymore either : ) your
notion of ?fun? changes as you mature, spiritually. fun may be for you now to
meditate on a flower in a garden for hours, or to highlight and notate your
favorite books, or trying to step into silence through meditation for a time.

my humble advice is to take it easy and while keeping your dedication to growing
(which i hear in your words), go about it as lightly as you can. imho, it is
okay to have a few drinks now and then. though some believe that to be
*anti*-spiritual path (as i used to), i think if done in balance and moderation,
it need not be a hindrance to growth.

there are however much more important goals and desires than ?fitting in?, as
you are learning. give it some time and those needs to be one of the gang, may
just fall away as you learn and grow. unfortunately, while awakened to an
awareness of a reality that this world shuns, that sense of alienation may
always be with you. despite finding a crew of beautiful people with whom i share
common values and structures of reality, it still sits within me, and can hurt,
bad. unless you can dig deep down within to the truth of unity and feel that
oneness with all things, this world is one of illusion and separation, and may
be painfully plain to you as time moves on.

whether they find you fun or not, andrew, there are reasons to be grateful and
levels of peace, joy, and unity existing within you, right now, that far surpass
any night out on the town or hanging around guzzling down the brew and being
goofy.

>but the catalyst they present is enormous and is a huge opportunity
>for growth. i am getting a lot better at making them understand the
>choices i am making and integrating their criticisms rather than
>rejecting them.

see, ?opportunity for growth?. you?re on the right track!

suggestion one: keep in mind that growth can be a slow process, not one that
moves according to your expectations, and will eventually, at some point in
time, create enough grief in you to know *what* surrender is, and how to do it,
imho.

suggestion two: know who you are. criticism will not carry its sting then.
perhaps friends may have some useful mirroring in their comments about who they
perceive you to be, but most likely the mirror is not in the information or
remarks that your friends make to you, but in your emotional reaction to them.
showing to you where your blockages are.

>but i wonder though how can i prevent distancing my
>self from them considering the alienation this situation presents?

like i was saying, sometimes you may have to stand apart? sometimes two
perceptual worlds can?t exactly be reconciled and joined together. choice
usually involves sacrifice and a letting go of something. that loss, sucks. what
is being lost though is only illusion and personality. eventually, there is a
true union with all as you become aware of that i am within ? at one with the
one.

in my life, there are times when i have wished myself ignorant of this path and
living back in the days when i was able to connect with those i thought i was
connecting with at parties and such? that i couldn?t do that (go hang out and
throw down a few drinks), despite *wanting* to do that, used to kill me inside
and hurt like hell to realize how unbreachable was the gulf between me and those
that used to be integral parts of my life.

now, i look at those echoes from the past and smile at them. because i have
found, as i am sure many on the spiritual path will attest to, that there is so
much more meaning, opportunity, purpose, and - through struggle, isolation, and
pain ? *fulfillment* that has become a part of this new life.

>loving regards,
>andrew

thank you for opening up some of your process to the list, andrew. i seriously
wish you the best on your path and am happy for you already because of the new
friendships you will develop on your way. and perhaps, as gail said,
reconnecting with the friends of your life when you are more sure of who you
are.

keep meditating! trust the perfection andrew,
garybean



p.s. here?s a ra excerpt from session #80 that i just love and think you?ll
enjoy.

questioner: could i say, then, that implicit in the process of becoming adept is
the seeming polarization towards service to self because the adept becomes
disassociated with many of his kind?

ra: i am ra. this is likely to occur. the apparent happening is disassociation
whether the truth is service to self and thus true disassociation from
other-selves or service-to-others and thus true association with the heart of
all other-selves and disassociation only from the illusory husks which prevent
the adept from correctly perceiving the self and other-self as one.

questioner: then you say that this effect of disassociation on the
service-to-others adept is a stumbling block or slowing process in reaching that
goal to which he aspires? is this correct?

ra: i am ra. this is incorrect. this disassociation from the miasma of illusion
and misrepresentation of each and every distortion is a quite necessary portion
of an adept?s path. it may be seen by others to be unfortunate.




---------------------------------
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[non-text portions of this message have been removed]

[drewez1981]

dear garybean, jeremy, gail and all who have responded to my thread,

first of all, gary, wow. you plain out read me like a book. your
insight into this matter is mind-blowing, and i thank you so much
for sharing. it is no coincidence that these things are happening
and that there are people out there who can relate to exactly how i
feel. i can't thank you and everyone else enough for your support.

i realize that this is a major transitional period for me and that
the 'ways of old' are slowly dissolving into ways of understanding.
it is during this time that i must be most vigilent in staying true
to myself and others. fear must be brought to the surface and dealt
with as i feel there is much there.

garybean wrote:
> sometimes, on issues such as these, it is best to keep it to
>oneself. let the information distill within you, open your heart
>and mind further, and aid you in being of better service to those
>about you. what you may want to share is not your books, per se,
>but the love and acceptance you are able to radiate because of your
>diligence in knowing and accepting yourself ? guided by your heart
>and desire to seek. share the fruits of your seeking, your higher
>vibrations, that is.

> (dude, i have so much to ramble on about because of your post, so
>please forgive me because i will take up some "k" here.)
>
> in my case, i found soo much information about the universe that
>we live in ? through books, websites, and the like - that was
>filling me in ways that nothing material ever had. i thought it
>should be just as exciting, enriching, and satisfying to others
>around me. you know, something works for you, so you want to tell
>those that you love and say, "look at this! read this, and you'll
>see what i see? you'll see that there are answers. there is a way.
>there is a reason!! there is meaning, and work to do, and a plan?
>and most importantly, a creator? and it's all about loovvee!!"
>
> so i tried to give books to people, channelings, website links? my
>batting average was nothing to be admired. so far i've learned that
>a listening ear and caring heart are usually of far better service
then a thesis on what it is you believe and why you believe : )
>
> many people i've met seemed to have dulled and even turned off
>their inner senses and desires that seek to know the mystery which
>they are heirs to. to personalities unaware of their own soul,
>stuff like this, isn't going to fly too well. why? fear on some
>level, i suppose, though i could be wrong.
>

andrew: i understand that everyone is on their own path of self-
realization and can only handle a certain amount of 'out-there'
ideas at a time. spiritual growth is gradual and just as i would
not have been ready for the law of one a couple years ago, people
can't be shown the law of one or these new 'realities' when they are
not ready. i just won't fit with them. i must keep this in my mind
when i am excited about a new discovery, although i'm getting better
at determining who i know would interested.

garybean wrote:
> as you stick your head in your books and research, and continue
>to "tabernacle" with the infinite one in meditation, you will
>develop an entirely different and heart centered way of seeing
>things which will necessarily bring with it a whole new vocabulary!
>unless, as jeremy was saying, you learn how to speak to others
>using their own native (english) language and symbols, they will
>not be able to comprehend your ra-speak. they may even react with
>contempt, criticism, and other forms of fear.

andrew: this is very true. although in my case, most of their
reactions are sarcastic and the topic of discussion will usually be
the butt-end of a joke of some sort (pretty funny ones too). but
that's the way some friends are, and i can accept that. i know
their reactions are purely for laughs and not to discredit the
information.

garybean wrote:
> be honest with yourself though and ask if what you seek to share
>with them is motivated by some desire to *justify* your new
>identity and your worth. if you are indeed doing this and placing
>the legitimacy of your heart in others hands for their
>approval/disapproval, you're setting yourself up and the pain will
>not decrease until you can learn to love yourself, and them, for
>who you and they are - without needing their okay for your way. we
>all need validation from others at different times, i'm not free
>of that distortion. just try to know that being is its own
>justification?

andrew: thank you for this, gary. this is huge. you have brought
something to the surface i have not fully realized. i have a lot of
work to do in regards to self-acceptance.

garybean wrote:
> ha ha! i could have written this myself! my group was a bar
>going/partying group in which my identity and sense of belonging
>was derived. my life, its values, distortions of correct/incorrect
>behavior all derived from what i perceived to be their opinions and
>their ways to live life in this world. i began to enter into the
>same process of walking steps in a direction away from the bar that
>lead not *to* any place without but rather, within.
>
> i just gradually began to lose interest in the habits and social
>activities of my friends (and some family) which before had
>motivated me and defined my world. more and more i began to feel a
>need to change, a growing drive to better myself, to heal, to
>unblock blockages, to acquire knowledge on matters of the spirit
>that i could soak up, to *understand* my self and the universe in
>turn?. to figure out what the freak was "wrong" with me, who i was
>and how i even came to be that way ? losing one identity and
>building the foundation for a new one.

andrew: you basically summed up my situation right there!!!

garybean wrote:
> my humble advice: stop trying to explain. i would bet that your
>battles of "explaining" continue on in the mental thoughts and
>dramas inside your head long past the last conversation you had
>with an antagonistic friend. in this particular catalyst, the point
>is not to justify your path and your wonders to those you can no
>longer connect with? no, i believe it has another reason for being
>in your life pattern. ask yourself why you feel the need to explain
>to them and seek their acceptance of it. feel the emotions
>involved, watch the thoughts that cycle round and round this
>catalyst between you and they? with enough time and growth, it will
>lead you deeper within? exposing layers underneath these situations
>where secrets to your identity lie.

andrew: extremely helpful, thank you.

garybean wrote:
> there was a statement that has given me strength and the will to
>continue to walk in different moments that i picked up from scott
>mandelker's book, universal vision. your story reminds me of it. i
>just went to look it up in the book (its been a while) and there is
>actually a chapter titled "standing alone." i'll type up an excerpt
for you:
>
> "we can also look at the spiritual path in another way. the higher
you go, the smaller the crowd! ? the more effort we put into self-
cultivation, the more time we spend in meditation, study, service,
and reflection, the more we do tend to split off from the main body
of society ? though spiritual dedication generates more compassion,
desire to serve, and a sense of unity, it generally separates us (at
least in awareness) from our peers. to boldly turn towards spirit,
at least here in 3d, usually requires us to turn away from the
world ? at least for certain periods of time ? and learn to stand
alone."

andrew: that is an excellent book which i already have. i recommend
it to anyone who is on the path of self-realization. a great
wanderer resource as well.

garybean wrote:
> and on the "not being fun anymore"? i'm not any fun anymore
>either : ) your notion of "fun" changes as you mature,
>spiritually. fun may be for you now to meditate on a flower in a
>garden for hours, or to highlight and notate your favorite books,
>or trying to step into silence through meditation for a time.

andrew: this is beginning to be the case for me as well. my friends
would laugh their heads off if they knew i'd rather meditate on
flowers rather than go out drinking. i can't even believe that!
wow, i am changing!

garybean wrote:
> suggestion two: know who you are. criticism will not carry its
>sting then. perhaps friends may have some useful mirroring in their
>comments about who they perceive you to be, but most likely the
>mirror is not in the information or remarks that your friends make
>to you, but in your emotional reaction to them. showing to you
>where your blockages are.

andrew: very insightful, something in need of more contemplation.

> i've been where you are at now dude. i wasn't the first, and you
>won't be the last. as i understand it, many have gone through this
>as they have awakened from the dream of the personality, to the
>greater dream of the soul. it is nothing new and is a process that
>if you are not currently grateful for, you will eventually look
>back bless and thank it all for offering to you the lessons you
>needed to find and live your inner light.

andrew: very true, gary. i hope can be as much help to someone else
as you have to me.
>
> thank you for opening up some of your process to the list, andrew.
>i seriously wish you the best on your path and am happy for you
>already because of the new friendships you will develop on your
>way. and perhaps, as gail said, reconnecting with the friends of
>your life when you are more sure of who you are.
>
> keep meditating! trust the perfection andrew,
> garybean

andrew: you have given me a lot to work with, gary. it makes me
feel a lot better to know that my situation has been encountered and
conquered by many (at least one!) before me.

to everyone else who responded to my post, i thank you whole-
heartedly. my journey would be a lonely one if i didn't have you
guys. thank you so much for all of your support.

with love,
andrew

[drewez1981]

dear brendan,


> abosolutely. i also have gone through this type of experience
andrew.
> concering the seperation betweens certain people around here and
myself.
> jeremy made some good points - also i wanted to say that u can
follow your
> gut to where it points.
>
> for me personally, i know as i grew and continue to grow into a new
> thoughtspace, then those types of energies that i'm yearning for
come closer
> - but only if u allow them to. i'm sure you'll be able to meet new
people
> but dealing with the seperation from the previous ( thats if u do
in fact
> choose to make them previous) - is just part of the growing
process.
>
> take care
> brendan


thank you very much for your insights. i understand that it can be
very difficult to let go of old patterns. the hardest thing will be
to allow the the new ones to come through when your subconscious is
working against you. the security of status quo is certainly more
comforting to your subconscious than the feeling of insecurity in
dealing with something new. the important thing is to have faith
and trust the process as scary as it may be.

thanks again,
andrew