NDE Part 1

[Mawk]

THROUGH THE LIGHT

Mellen-Thomas Benedict is an artist who survived a near-death experience in
1982. He was dead for over an hour and a half and during that time, he rose
up out of his body and went into the Light. Curious about the universe, he
was taken far into the remote depths of existence, and even beyond, into the
energetic Void of Nothingness behind the Big Bang. Concerning his near-death
experience, Dr. Kenneth Ring has said, "His story is one of the most
remarkable I have encountered in my extensive research on near-death
experiences."

THE ROAD TO DEATH

In 1982 I died from terminal cancer. The condition I had was inoperable,
and any kind of chemotherapy they could give me would just have made me more
of a vegetable. I was given six to eight months to live. I had been an
information freak in the 1970's, and I had become increasingly despondent
over the nuclear crisis, the ecology crisis, and so forth. So, since I did
not have a spiritual basis, I began to believe that nature had made a
mistake, and that we were probably a cancerous organism on the planet. I
saw no way that we could get out from all the problems we had created for
ourselves and the planet. I perceived all humans as cancer, and that is
what I got. That is what killed me. Be careful what your world view is. It
can feed back on you, especially if it is a negative world view. I had a
seriously negative one. That is what led me into my death. I tried all
sorts of alternative healing methods, but nothing helped.

So I determined that this was really just between me and God. I had never
really faced God before, or even dealt with God. I was not into any kind of
spirituality at the time, but I began a journey into learning about
spirituality and alternative healing. I set out to do all the reading I
could and bone up on the subject, because I did not want to be surprised on
the other side. So I started reading on various religions and philosophies.
They were all very interesting, and gave hope that there was something
on the other side.

On the other hand, as a self-employed stained-glass artist at the time, I
had no medical insurance whatsoever. So my life
savings went overnight into testing. Then I was facing the medical
profession without any kind of insurance. I did not want to have my family
dragged down financially, so I determined to handle this myself. There was
not constant pain, but there were
black-outs. I got so that I would not dare to drive, and eventually I ended
up in hospice care.

I had my own personal hospice caretaker. I was very blessed by this angel
who went through the last part of this with me. I lasted about eighteen
months. I did not want to take a lot of drugs, since I wanted to be as
conscious as possible. Then I experienced such pain that I had nothing but
pain in my consciousness, luckily only for a few days at a time.

THE LIGHT OF GOD

I remember waking up one morning at home about 4:30 am, and I just knew that
this was it. This was the day I was going to die. So I called a few
friends and said goodbye. I woke up my hospice caretaker and told her. I
had a private agreement
with her that she would leave my dead body alone for six hours, since I had
read that all kinds of interesting things happen when you die. I went back
to sleep.

The next thing I remember is the beginning of a typical near-death
experience. Suddenly I was fully aware and I was standing up, but my body
was in the bed. There was this darkness around me. Being out of my body
was even more vivid than ordinary experience. It was so vivid that I could
see every room in the house, I could see the top of the house, I could see
around the house, I could see under the house.

There was this Light shining. I turned toward the Light. The Light was
very similar to what many other people have described in their near-death
experiences. It was so magnificent. It is tangible; you can feel it. It
is alluring; you want to go to it like you would want to go to your ideal
mother's or father's arms. As I began to move toward the Light, I knew
intuitively that if I went to the Light, I would be dead. So as I was
moving toward the Light I said, "Please wait a minute, just hold on a second
here. I want to think about this; I would like to talk to you before I go."

To my surprise, the entire experience halted at that point. You are indeed
in control of your near-death experience. You are not on a roller coaster
ride. So my request was honored and I had some conversations with the
Light. The Light kept changing into different figures, like Jesus, Buddha,
Krishna, mandalas, archetypal images and signs. I asked the Light, "What is
going on here? Please, Light, clarify yourself for me. I really want to
know the reality of the situation." I cannot really say the exact words,
because it was sort of telepathy.

The Light responded. The information transferred to me was that your
beliefs shape the kind of feedback you are getting before the Light. If you
were a Buddhist or Catholic or Fundamentalist, you get a feedback loop of
your own stuff. You have a chance to look at it and examine it, but most
people do not. As the Light revealed itself to me, I became aware that what
I was really seeing was our Higher Self matrix.

The only thing I can tell you is that it turned into a matrix, a mandala of
human souls, and what I saw was that what we call our Higher Self in each of
us is a matrix. It's also a conduit to the Source; each one of us comes
directly, as a direct experience from the Source. We all have a Higher
Self, or an oversoul part of our being. It revealed itself to me in its
truest energy form. The only way I can really describe it is that the being
of the Higher Self is more like a conduit. It did not look like that, but
it is a direct connection to the Source that each and every one of us has.
We are directly connected to the Source.

So the Light was showing me the Higher Self matrix. And it became very
clear to me that all the Higher Selves are connected as one being, all
humans are connected as one being, we are actually the same being, different
aspects of the same being. It was not committed to one particular religion.
So that is what was being fed back to me. And I saw this mandala of human
souls. It was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I just went into
it and, it was just over-whelming. It was like all the love you've every
wanted, and it was the kind of love that cures, heals, regenerates.

As I asked the Light to keep explaining, I understood what the Higher Self
matrix is. We have a grid around the planet where all the Higher Selves are
connected. This is like a great company, a next subtle level of energy
around us, the spirit level, you might say. Then, after a couple of minutes,
I asked for more clarification. I really wanted to know what the universe
is about, and I was ready to go at that time. I said "I am ready, take me."
Then the Light turned into the most beautiful thing that I have ever seen: a
mandala of human souls on this planet.

Now I came to this with my negative view of what has happen on the planet.
So as I asked the light to keep clarifying for me, I saw in this magnificent
mandala how beautiful we all are in our essence, our core. We are the most
beautiful creations. The human soul, the human matrix that we all make
together is absolutely fantastic, elegant, exotic, every- thing. I just
cannot say enough about how it changed my opinion of human beings in that
instant.

I said, "Oh, God, I did not know how beautiful we are." At any level, high
or low, in whatever shape you are in, you are the most beautiful creation,
you are. I was astonished to find that there was no evil in any soul. I
said "How can this be?" The answer was that no soul was inherently evil.
The terrible things that happened to people might make them do evil things,
but their souls were not evil. What all people seek, what sustains them, is
love, the Light told me. What distorts people is a lack of love.

The revelations coming from the Light seemed to go on and on, then I asked
the Light, "Does this mean that humankind will be saved?" Then, like a
trumpet blast with a shower of spiraling lights, the Great Light spoke,
saying, "Remember this and never forget; you save, redeem and heal yourself.
You always have. You always will. You were created with the power to do so
from before the beginning of the world."

In that instant I realized even more. I realized that WE HAVE ALREADY BEEN
SAVED, and we saved ourselves because we were designed to self-correct like
the rest of God's universe. This is what the second coming is about. I
thanked the Light of God with all my heart. The best thing I could come up
with was these simple words of totally appreciation: "Oh dear God, dear
Universe, dear Great Self, I love my Life."

The Light seemed to breathe me in even more deeply. It was as if the Light
was completely absorbing me. The Love Light is, to this day,
indescribable. I entered into another realm, more profound than the last,
and became aware of something more, much more. It was an enormous stream of
Light, vast and full, deep in the Heart of Life. I asked what this was.

The Light responded, "This is the RIVER OF LIFE. Drink of this manna water
to your heart's content." So I did. I took one big drink and then another.
To drink of Life Itself! I was in ecstasy. Then the Light said, "You have a
desire." The Light knew all about me, everything past, present and future.
"Yes!" I whispered.

I asked to see the rest of the Universe; beyond our solar system, beyond all
human illusion. The Light then told me that I could go with the Stream. I
did, and was carried through the Light at the end of the tunnel. I felt and
heard a series of very soft sonic booms. What a rush!

THE VOID OF NOTHINGNESS

Suddenly I seemed to be rocketing away from the planet on this stream of
Life. I saw the earth fly away. The solar system, in
all its splendor, whizzed by and disappeared. At faster than light speed, I
flew through the center of the galaxy, absorbing
more knowledge as I went. I learned that this galaxy, and all of the
Universe, is bursting with many different varieties of LIFE. I saw many
worlds. The good news is that we are not alone in this Universe!

As I rode this stream of consciousness through the center of the galaxy, the
stream was expanding in awesome fractal waves of energy. The super clusters
of galaxies with all their ancient wisdom flew by. At first I thought I was
going somewhere; actually traveling. But then I realized that, as the
stream was expanding, my own consciousness was also expanding to take in
everything in the Universe! All creation passed by me. It was an
unimaginable wonder! I truly was a Wonder Child; a babe
in Wonderland!

It seemed as if all the creations in the Universe soared by me and vanished
in a speck of Light. Almost immediately, a second Light appeared. It came
from all sides, and was so different; a Light made up of more than every
frequency in the Universe. I felt and heard several velvety sonic booms
again. My consciousness, or being, was expanding to interface with the
entire
Holographic Universe and more.

As I passed into the second Light, the awareness came to me that I had just
transcended the Truth. Those are the best words I have for it, but I will
try to explain. As I passed into the second Light, I expanded beyond the
First Light. I found myself in a profound stillness, beyond all silence. I
could see or perceive FOREVER, beyond Infinity.

I was in the Void.

I was in pre-creation, before the Big Bang. I had crossed over the
beginning of time - the First Word - the First vibration. I was in the Eye
of Creation. I felt as if I was touching the Face of God. It was not a
religious feeling. Simply I was at one with Absolute Life and
Consciousness.

When I say that I could see or perceive forever, I mean that I could
experience all of creation generating itself. It was without beginning and
without end. That's a mind-expanding thought, isn't it? Scientists perceive
the Big Bang as a single event which
created the Universe. I saw that the Big Bang is only one of an infinite
number of Big Bangs creating Universes endlessly and simultaneously. The
only images that even come close in human terms would be those created by
supercomputers using fractal geometry equations.

The ancients knew of this. They said Godhead periodically created new
Universes by breathing out, and de-creating other Universes by breathing in.
These epochs were called Yugas. Modern science called this the Big Bang. I
was in absolute, pure consciousness. I could see or perceive all the Big
Bangs or Yugas creating and de-creating themselves. Instantly I entered into
them all simultaneously. I saw that each and every little piece of creation
has the power to create. It is very difficult to try to explain this. I am
still speechless about this.

It took me years after I returned to assimilate any words at all for the
Void experience. I can tell you this now; the Void is less than nothing,
yet more than everything that is! The Void is absolute zero; chaos forming
all possibilities. It is Absolute Consciousness; much more than even
Universal Intelligence.

Where is the Void? I know. The Void is inside and outside everything. You,
right now even while you live, are always inside and outside the Void
simultaneously. You don't have to go anywhere or die to get there. The
Void is the vacuum or nothingness between all physical manifestations. The
SPACE between atoms and their components.

Modern science has begun to study this space between everything. They call
it Zero-point. Whenever they try to measure it, their instruments go off
the scale, or to infinity, so to speak. They have no way, as of yet, to
measure infinity accurately. There is more of the zero space in your own
body and the Universe than anything else!

What mystics call the Void is not a void. It is so full of energy, a
different kind of energy that has created everything that we are.
Everything since the Big Bang is vibration, from the first Word, which is
the first vibration. The biblical "I am" really has a question mark after
it. "I am - What am I?"

So creation is God exploring God's Self through every way imaginable, in an
ongoing, infinite exploration through every one of us. Through every piece
of hair on your head, through every leaf on every tree, through every atom,
God is exploring God's Self, the great "I am". I began to see that
everything that is, is the Self, literally, your Self, my Self. Everything
is the great Self. That is why God knows even when a leaf falls. That is
possible because wherever you are is the center of the universe. Wherever
any atom is, that is the center of the universe. There is God in that, and
God in the Void.

As I was exploring the Void and all the Yugas or creations, I was completely
out of time and space as we know it. In this expanded state, I discovered
that creation is about Absolute Pure Consciousness, or God, coming into the
Experience of Life as we know it. The Void itself is devoid of experience.
It is pre-life, before the first vibration. Godhead is about more than
Life and Death. Therefore there is even more than Life and Death to
experience in the Universe!

I was in the Void and I was aware of everything that had ever been created.
It was like I was looking out of God's eyes. I had become God. Suddenly I
wasn't me anymore. The only thing I can say, I was looking out of God's
eyes. And suddenly I knew why every atom was, and I could see everything.
The interesting point was that I went into the Void, I came back with this
understanding that God is not there. God is here. That's what it is all
about.

So this constant search of the human race to go out and find God ... God
gave everything to us, everything is here - this is where it's at. And what
we are into now is God's exploration of God through us. People are so busy
trying to become God that they ought to realize that we are already God and
God is becoming us. That's what it is really about.

When I realized this, I was finished with the Void, and wanted to return to
this creation, or Yuga. It just seemed like the natural thing to do. Then
I suddenly came back through the second Light, or the Big Bang, hearing
several more velvet booms. I rode the stream of consciousness back through
all of creation, and what a ride it was! The super clusters of galaxies
came through me with even more insights.

I passed through the center of our galaxy, which is a black hole. Black
holes are the great processors or recyclers of the
Universe. Do you know what is on the other side of a Black Hole? We are;
our galaxy; which has been reprocessed from another Universe. In its total
energy configuration, the galaxy looked like a fantastic city of lights.
All energy this side of the Big Bang is light. Every sub-atom, atom, star,
planet, even consciousness itself is made of light and has a frequency
and/or particle. Light is living stuff. Everything is made of light, even
stones. So everything is alive. Everything is made from the Light of God;
everything is very intelligent.