self

[Tiffani Boswell]

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><font face="bakersignet" size="4">its late and i am being totally honest and open:</font>
><font face="bakersignet" size="4"></font>
>jeremy said "so that's where the work
should focus - on the mystery of the self being a
manifestation of the infinite." (and all the talk on what it means to be integrated)...

>"since your higher,
integrated self programs experience for you. " so jeremy>>>>>what does this mean to you ( and others ) in the sense of integrate self programs to experience....
>
><font face="bakersignet" size="4">ok...and i don't mean to over simplify but i am trying to apply this to every day life (and donna i am glad you said what you have said ...i is great that we can discuss this...!!!!)</font>
><font face="bakersignet" size="4">so now...jeremy said" </font>ok, so now, to be more direct, think about it. if you
observe something in somebody that you don't like, and
if you really think about it and are honest with
yourself, you'll realize that it's not them you're
really angry at, it's yourself. the person is
displaying a characteristic that *you* don't like
about *yourself*, and the person is just reflecting it
back to you. if you didn't embody that characteristic
yourself, you wouldn't recognize it or latch on to it.
there's a lot of truth in the childhood taunt, "it
takes one to know one."
>
><font face="bakersignet" size="4">tiffani says" so jeremy does that mean when i my significant other has been reminded two days in a row to do something... and he reacts in a negative way...that he is displaying a characteristic about *me* that i don't want....??
please help me, can you give actual examples (everyone)</font>
><font face="bakersignet" size="4"></font>
><font face="bakersignet" size="4">ok new thought</font>
><font face="bakersignet" size="4">well same thought sort of...this comes back to my husband the other night readin part of a book i had read before that said "there is no right and wrong here in this place" ( be it dimension, time otherwise)</font>
><font face="bakersignet" size="4"></font>
><font face="bakersignet" size="4">how do i explain that one....he put down that book so fast...and my only response was that...'well maybe that is not the book/thoughts that you need right now...so it is ok to [ut it down..just because i got something out of it doesn't mean you will' etc etc</font>
><font face="bakersignet" size="4"></font>
><font face="bakersignet" size="4">but i am still at an impass....i see it in my head but can't describe it...so help</font>

[Mingo42271@...]

<font face="arial,helvetica"><font size="3">hello tiffani, if your husband reacts negatively after you've asked him twice to do something, couldn't it be that he's the one that should be learning from you in that experience? other wise i would think that maybe there is something that he has expected of you that you haven't done??? i'm really not sure.....that's a tough one. maybe that experience isn't a mirroring one. donna</font><font color="#000000" size="2" family="sansserif" face="arial" lang="0">





in a message dated 12/11/01 10:09:24 pm pacific standard time, tiffani@2000wave.com writes:

<blockquote type="cite" style="border-left: #0000ff 2px solid; margin-left: 5px; margin-right: 0px; padding-left: 5px">
tiffani says" so jeremy does that mean when i my significant other has been reminded two days in a row to do something... and he reacts in a negative way...that he is displaying a characteristic about *me* that i don't want....??</font><font color="#000000" size="4" family="sansserif" face="arial" lang="0">

</font><font color="#000000" size="2" family="sansserif" face="arial" lang="0">please help me, can you give actual examples (everyone)

</font><font color="#000000" size="3" family="sansserif" face="arial" lang="0">

</blockquote>

</font><font color="#000000" size="2" family="sansserif" face="arial" lang="0">

</font>

[ebarrettes]

> > tiffani says" so jeremy does that mean when i my significant
other has been
> > reminded two days in a row to do something... and he reacts in a
negative
> > way...that he is displaying a characteristic about *me* that i
don't
> > want....??
> > please help me, can you give actual examples (everyone)

this stuff is very similiar to the catalyst that i have been
experiencing lately!

at night after my husband and i have worked a full day, we come home
to our two very young children (2 1/2 and 6 months). i used to come
home and play with them, and get all worked up because my husband
wouldn't help me play with them, but would sit on the couch and chill
out. my rational was that he should help me with the kids and show
them love and affection when we get home... lots of reasons!

i came around to realizing that yes, i can ask him to help, but when
he doesn't he is merely exercising his free will. me getting angry
at him is based on the expectation that i can control his actions.
and i did try to, with guilt and moping.

and now, if he doesn't want to help, he doesn't want to help. and i
let go of the anger, 'cause i can't control him and tell him what to
do. this was *his* choice and not *mine*.

i choose to let go of the illusion that i can control him. i realize
that if i want my kids to get attention and love after a long, tiring
day, that's my burden and my choice.

hope that helps!

[Jeremy Weiland]

> i choose to let go of the illusion that i can
> control him. i realize
> that if i want my kids to get attention and love
> after a long, tiring
> day, that's my burden and my choice.

exactly. and plus, he's the one that's missing out
playing with the kids when they're most fun, anyway
:-)

jeremy


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